Healing ✔

Chapter 29

ZACHARIAH

I am awoke for the second time at night by the Fajr alarm. First it had been Sara's cries and now the bloody alarm won't stop. Why was it so loud today. I tried to cover my ears thinking it would be but a while but it continued on for some time.

Having had enough I raise my head off the pillow and peak one eye open.

"Sara?" I look across and she is fast asleep and then discover why the alarm is so loud. There and behold 2 ft away from me was Sara's phone alarm lying on the floor. I reach over and turn it off not bothering to lift it off the floor. It seemed like too much effort for the moment. Through sleepy eyes I glanced at Sara wondering if I could get away without praying Fajr today since Sara wasn't getting up today, She would never know, but just as the thought entered my mind a bone chilling sliver ran down my spine and a wave of guilt flushed over me from head to toe at the mere thought of such vicious intention.

I sigh and lay my head back and let the battle commence.

No. I couldn't do that. Not when I felt Allah watching me having this battle in my head. I throw the duvet off and haul myself up fighting the sleep trying to take over every ounce of my body.

Having accomplished my first mission of even getting out my bed I find it becoming easier as I make whudu and so on.

Well I couldn't talk myself out of praying now my mind tells me.

I pray the 4 Rakats and plan to make a beeline straight for my bed but before that I check up on Sara.

The peace and tranquil of the night descends heavily showering its mercy across every household. The blessing of the night had always been there, and now was when I finally saw the beauty of it as I watched Sara sleeping as her body and mind cut off from the worries and stress and fears of this world. I smile feeling content knowing she was not wrapped in a nightmare as she had been 4 hours ago.

She was fast asleep her small form swallowed up by the huge king size duvet, her hair was sprawled across her face gently and very cautiously I lean over and push the hair out of her face and frown. Her face becomes revealed in the sheer bit of moonlight and it feels as though I'm looking at her for the first time but in a different light.

Her eyes are closed so there is no sign of fear or anger coming from her. No look of horror of me being so near. Just her beautiful pure face with so much innocence. She was definitely asleep yet she wore a frown.

I reach over once more and touch her forehead to smooth over the lines but immediately thereafter her body turns over towards me as a reaction and her hands grab onto mine. For the first time my mind doesn't respond quick enough and my heart crashes

For a second I think I am caught as I freeze in a tree pose and suck in my breath but to my utter relief Sara snuggles into my hand and I notice the frown disappear. Every breath she took could be felt warm against my hand, slow and steady a sign that she was sleeping.

I don't dare let out a breath until I count to 10 and then and only then do I let out my breath ever so discreetly.

I curse under my breath carefully in case Sara hears it in her sleep. She always did manage to hear me cuss even when I thought she wasn't listening, her hearing would just turn up a few notches in those moments somehow that I was convinced she had a hidden headset to my voice-box for when I slipped up with my words. I can just picture that frown of hers whenever a bad word would slip my lips, It was always followed by a simple sorry from my side.

I glance back at our hands again, her small hands in contrast to my big ones.

Now only remains one problem.