Enjoy Your Life

Who is the most beloved to you?

You will become the most proficient in using the various skills in dealing with others when you treat everyone in such a way that he thinks of himself as the most beloved of all people to yourself. For instance, you should treat your mother so grandly that she begins to think you have never treated anyone in such a fine manner.

You can say the same about the way you should deal with your father, your wife, your children, and your colleagues. In fact, you can say the same about someone you meet only once, such as a shopkeeper, or a petrol station attendant. You could get all these people to agree that you are the most beloved of all to them, if only you can make them feel that they are the most beloved of all to you!

The Prophet PBUH was an expert in this.

Whoever reads about the life of the Prophet PBUH will find that he would deal with everyone in an excellent manner. Whoever he met, he would be very welcoming and cheerful, such that the person would think that he was the most beloved of all to him, and therefore, the Prophet PBUH would also become the most beloved of all to that person.

The shrewdest of the Arabs were four, and 'Amr bin al-'Aas was deemed one of them due to his wisdom, sharpness and intelligence. When 'Amr embraced Islam, he was the leader amongst his people, and whenever he met the Prophet PBUH, he would always find him very warm and cheerful.Whenever he entered a gathering where the Prophet PBUH was sitting, he would be warmly welcomed. When the Prophet PBUH would call him, he would use the names that were most beloved to him.

By experiencing such excellent treatment, he felt certain that he was the most beloved of all to the Messenger of Allah PBUH. One day, he decided to confirm his feelings, so he approached the Prophet PBUH and sat next to him.

He said, 'O Messenger of Allah, who is the most beloved to you?'

He said, "A'ishah."

'Amr said, "No. I mean, from the men, O Messenger of Allah. I do not mean from amongst your family."

He said, "Her father."

'Amr said, "And then?"

He said, "Umar bin al-Khattab."

'Amr said, "And then?"

The Prophet PBUH then began to mention a number of people saying, "So-and-so and so-and-so..." in accordance with how early they had embraced Islam and the sacrifices they had made.

'Amr then said, "I then remained silent, fearing that he may rank me last!"

Notice how the Prophet PBUH managed to capture 'Amr's heart by exercising his outstanding skills. In fact, the Prophet PBUH would rank people according to their worth. Sometimes, he would even leave what he was doing to tend to other's needs, just to make them feel that they were loved and held in high regard.

When the Prophet's influence extended after his conquests and Islam had spread far and wide, the Prophet PBUH began sending preachers to various tribes to call them to Islam. Sometimes he even had to send armies. 'Adi bin Hatim al-Ta'i was a king and the son of a king. When the Prophet PBUH sent an army to the Tai' tribe, 'Adi ran away from the battle and took refuge in Syria. When the Muslim army reached Tai' they found it easy to defeat them as they had neither a king nor an organised army. The Muslims would always treat people kindly in wars and respect their emotions, even during battle. The purpose of the battle was to prevent the plots of 'Adi's people against the Muslims and to display to them the Muslims' strength. The Muslims captured some people from 'Adi's tribe, amongst whom was 'Adi's sister. They took the captives to the Prophet PBUH in Madinah and informed him about 'Adi's escape to Syria. The Prophet PBUH was surprised, thinking how could he have run away from the ture religion? How could he have left his people behind?