Dream // irwin

Wash Away

{{SO PLAY HUMAN BY CHRISTINA PERRI WHILE READING THIS}}

It's been one week since Josie's funeral, and I was currently sitting at home, for the first time in forever, slightly worried because my complete breakdown hadn't came yet. I was worried it would come, and I wouldn't be prepared. I was scrolling through twitter, and that's when I saw the tweet, everyone seemed to be retweeting it onto my timeline on twitter.

@ElleHealy: guys I know you're saying you miss Josie but honestly nobody seems to be missing her as much as Brighton.

I decided to reply to her tweet, just because I needed to get it out.

@Brigh_Edwards: @ElleHealy Honestly I can't show any emotions so I don't understand why people think I miss her the most...

@ElleHealy: @Brigh_Edwards Trust me, you're just in shock now.

-

Two hours later, Ashton came over to my house, and waited as I took a shower, while he waited in my room. I get out of the shower, and dry off, before putting on my clothes and drying my hair. I quickly did what I've been doing a lot lately, cutting.

I opened the door and Ashton was laying on my bed holding a picture in a frame from when Josie and I were 12. I walked over and laid next to him.

"Life sucks." I say after a few seconds.

"Brighton, it's just one small down in life's up and downs, it'll get better, and if not, I'll be here, with you." He wraps his free arm around me.

"I know, but life really sucks." I sighed, and for what felt like the first time, realisation settled in. I buried my face in my hands and brought my knees to my chest, and began to cry.

I cried because my life felt to messed up right now.

I cried because I felt like I had no hope.

I cried because I did things I hadn't done in a long time.

I cried because I was depressed again.

I cried because my world was slowly breaking down again.

I cried because lately my life has only been going down, it's not going up.

I cried because I know people love me, but they just can't understand how I really feel.

I cried because I wouldn't be able to talk with my best friend anymore.

I cried because the one person who could probably help me trough this was gone.

I cried because my best friend was gone.

That's when I realised, I needed to pull myself together, because yeah, life's hard, but I can get through this. In a mix of depression and hope, I wipe away my tears, and breath in deeply.

"Shh, it's okay, I'm here now." Ashton soothingly whispers.

"I know, you are here." I whisper moving closer to him as he set the picture down, and hugged me closer to his chest.

"Brighton." He says after a minuet of me crying into his chest.

"Hmm?" I softly hum.

"I love you." He says quietly.

"I know, I love you too." I whisper back.

AWWW OH MY GOD WOW 100 VEIWS WHOOP!!!

So as I promised, here's the question of the day.

QOTD: What's your favourite colour?

AOTD: Red :)

I can't stop smiling, they love eachother . This just made me smile to myself. Also Brighton had her breakdown, finally.

DOUBLE UPDATE YAAASSSSS

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOSIE AHHHH!!!!

I killed you on your birthday what kind if a friend am I?

Byyyyeeeeee

-Johannah (Remember when your grandpa called us this? @jyrb513)