"You gave me more to live for more than you'll ever know."
— Last Goodbye by Jeff BuckleyIt had been five years since I had been married to Robert, seven since we've known each other, but it was only yesterday he found out what my favourite colour was. He had squinted his once warm, blue eyes at me and waved it off.
It didn't matter to him.
Despite being together for so many years, I hadn't fallen out of love while clearly, he had. We didn't smile at each other anymore, we didn't talk unless it was about Clara, our three year old daughter, we didn't eat together unless Clara was with us, too.
We didn't love each other anymore.
He hurt me, multiple times, but that didn't stop me from loving him any less.
Nights were sleepless and days were restless. Robert would be back home in the morning, reeking of women's perfume and peppermint. He'd crash in Clara's room, leaving me alone -- yet again. At night, I couldn't help but think about what went wrong. How did we end up like this. From being so in love to being so out of love. In the day, my mind would wonder off to all the moments we had shared together. From him kissing me for the first time in college to us having drunk late nights in the nearest club back in Poland, his home.
How could something so beautiful end up so bizarre?
It wasn't until one of his friends saw me that way and assisted me. It feels so wrong to do this, to even be with Mats when I know my own husband is cheating on me with another girl.
He said that he could mend me, Mats, but how do you mend something that already been broken several times?
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effervescent | m. hummels & r. lewandowski
Fanfiction❝I pray god throws his biggest sins at you.❞ ❝He already did, he threw you at me.❞ ©Adeline Waters 2017 // deals with harsh words and scenarios including rape and self harm, if you're not comfortable do not read ahead //