Shit, I'm Falling For A Weasley || George Weasley

Chapter 61 - In which I have a brief stopover at Malfoy Manor

The bus shudders as it speeds past the various little houses, filled with families who are happily sitting down for dinner. If I close my eyes for a second, I can just about imagine the scene in the Burrow. It's the usual routine; Mrs. Weasley would come faffing around making sure all the plates are in order, Bill and Fleur might pop in to hear news about the Order, they might all be joined by Lupin and Tonks, but with their current honeymoon phase, I doubt it. 

What my ear would be listening out for most would be the thundering of footsteps as two lean men rush down the stairs to the welcoming smell of dinner. My eyes would be trained on the man who would give me a cheeky wink, a smile that would warm me head to toe, a look that is so intense I have to be careful I don't set anything alight, quite literally.

Everything was going so well. Everything was perfect. 

It doesn't matter. None of it matters. Not anymore. 

All the memories from the Burrow are like a dream now; they're better off that way. I'm back to where I started; alone with my home as Malfoy Manor. But nothing is the same anymore. My heart aches for the Burrow, for Mrs. Weasley's freshly baked scones, Ginny's bright laughter, a person I carry more than secrets with. A person I knew was, is, should be mine.

Above all, my heart aches for the life I should have had. A life that seems so cruelly close now. A life where George is staring at me as if I'm the only person in the world. His soft hands, carefully stroking my cheek and removing any loose strands, just so that he could get a better view of my eyes. 

My hand slowly goes up to my cheek as the ghost of his touch haunts me. 

I don't deserve it. I don't deserve any of it after everything I put him through. As much as I try to convince myself that I had no choice, I did have a choice. I could have just let George fight her or I could have called someone to help; I did not need to intervene. I chose to intervene because it's Bellatrix. She already took Sirius, I know she would have taken George given the chance. 

I chose George.

As twisted as it looks to him, I need him to somehow understand that I chose him. I will always choose him. It's not a choice for me, it's never really been a choice. 

Now he'll never choose me. I'm not only the girl that broke his heart, but also the girl who betrayed him. I can't begin to imagine what he must be thinking of me right now. What would he be doing? Would he tell Fred about what happened or would he keep it to himself? Would Fred hate me, or would he blame himself for allowing his brother to dance with the devil? 

Scrunching my eyes shut, I shake my head. No. George will understand. He has to understand. You can't just fake being in love, he must know that I really truly do care about him. Merlin, it was only because I admitted my feelings towards George that I was able to access my powers back. All the other times my powers randomly burst out, when we played Quidditch, all the times I felt it stirring, it was because I was basking in love. 

How could he not know that I care about him?

When I saw Snape murder Dumbledore, it shattered every piece of love and hope I had. I lost my family. I lost the man I thought would always have my back. What's more, I lost myself. I forgot how to love myself and allow myself to care. Because of George, Ginny and everyone else at the Burrow, because of their patience and kindness, I was able to find myself again. I was able to access my powers again.

Yet another way George has saved me without realising it. When will that man ever stop caring about me? When will he just give up on me and leave?

Never