the strangers series. (mgk ; machine gun kelly)

27 ☆ 𝖕𝖗𝖔𝖑𝖔𝖌𝖚𝖊.

His eyelids flickered open ever-so-slowly, the blue orbs that made my heart melt every damn time I saw them landing on me as he got acquainted to the dark lighting.
My smile immediately grew as I continued watching him, my hands on his chest and my chin resting on top of them.
My stalker-like behavior didn't weird him out though, just made him smile in return as he groaned, stretching his arms and legs,
"Mm, good mornin', weirdo."
I bit my lip as I continued studying the sleepyhead, wanting nothing more than to just stay in this moment forever.
Mornings like these were the only good parts of the day- it was really the only moment I woke up excited for.
The icy shock that ran down my spine once his gaze returned back on me tore me out of my thoughts, snapping me back onto reality.
I felt his arms trail down my bare back under the sheets, kneading my skin slowly. The familiar ache that always ignited inside me whenever his hands were on me made me breathless, his eyes dragging me in.
He smirked those pink lips as he felt me tense up under his touch, my nervousness somehow amusing to him,
"You're so beautiful, goddamn."
I should be used to his loving words by now but I honestly wasn't. I wasn't used to being called beautiful on a daily basis, especially by a man like him.
I let out a soft giggle as I buried my head into his bare, tattooed chest, his chuckles vibrating through me,
"Stop,"
One of his hands slid up my back again, leaving goosebumps in its wake. I sighed against his warm skin as he continued to trace patterns on my back, his fingertips brushing my skin like a light feather,
"I'll never stop reminding you of that- never."
I listened to his slow breathing as I allowed his fingers to continue. It was a moment of peace for the both of us as we laid with each other, not a single care in the world.
Whenever we were in this spacious room of his, it was just us- everyone else outside of those doors didn't exist. None of them mattered when it was just us.
I planted a small kiss on his chest before glancing back up at his waiting eyes, his droopy eyelids widening back up as I made eye contact with him.
I sighed as I let my own fingers trace the tattoos that covered every inch of him,
"And I'll never stop reminding you of how handsome you are."
My words made him laugh, his deep voice sending another set of shivers down my spine,
"I hope you never do stop, damn."
I shook my head, laughing at his cheekiness. I felt the sudden urge to just get even closer to him, our bodies pressed up together not being enough for me.
I wrapped a leg over his hip, pushing myself up as I straddled him. His smirk grew deeper as he watched me lean forward until our lips met, his hands clutching onto my skin for dear life.
My fingers involuntarily wound up in his soft hair as the moment intensified the longer I stayed on top.
My heart raced against my chest as he groaned into my mouth, my own moan arising out of my throat.
I smiled against his lips as he did the same, pulling away for a second so we could breathe. I planted one more soft kiss before meeting his gaze, feeling the burn in my cheeks as I tried to calm myself down.
He licked his lips as he grinned up at me, his hands resting down around my waist now,
"Have I told you you're beautiful yet?"
What would I ever do without this man? I bit my lip as I pulled him up with me, his arms now fully wrapping around my bare waist as he hugged me into him.
I couldn't help the pure laugh that slipped out of my mouth,
"No, you haven't, but I'm happy you did."
He returned my wide smile with one of his own as he captured my lips with his once again. It wasn't an intense kiss but a soft and slow one, the kinda kiss that made your heart skip a few beats and made your palms all sweaty and legs weak.
My heart fell a little as he pulled away again, just enough so that the tips of our noses were barely brushing together. I watched his pupils dilate in the middle of the sea of blue as he studied every inch of my bare face, licking his lips again in an attempt to rile me up.
But that's how the past couple minutes flew by- my legs wrapped around his waist as I sat on his lap, his eyes roaming my face and body while his hands took in every inch of my skin.
It wasn't awkward at all, but comforting, in the sense that I didn't feel exposed in front of his eyes. In fact, I loved having them studying me.
I bit my lip for the millionth time as I allowed him to take me in in all of my naked glory, causing him to chuckle a little,
"Sorry, I just..."
He let his words trail off but I wanted to hear what he had to say. I pouted my lips a little as I leaned forward again, licking the skin beneath his jaw as he chuckled.
I smiled against his skin but didn't stop once, speaking my words into his throat as I left little butterfly kisses,
"You just what?"
He tilted his head so that I could have more room, which made me mentally roll my eyes, but I went along with it.
I felt his throat vibrate against my lips as he softly chuckled, his large hands roaming my skin again,
"I was just thinkin' about the future... our future."
Our future.
Those two words made my ears perk up, distracting me from my love-giving. I leaned back again, staring into the eyes that I loved so much. I studied his face for any clue as to where he was going with this but there was nothing but the usual warm look he always threw my way.
I felt a smile grow on my lips as I raised an eyebrow, ignoring his hands traveling down my back and focusing on the lip he bit as he stared at me piecing together the puzzle pieces,
"What... what do you mean? 'Future' as in... a marriage? As in Kids?"
My blabbering brought a smile onto Kells' lips, as if he was amused by my shock.
He licked them again as his eyes flickered down to my own lips before making their way back up to my waiting eyes. He nodded once as he stared up at me, innocently, as if he was just making a mere observation,
"Yeah. Obviously not right now, but later."
I felt the butterflies erupt in my stomach as I gazed down at the gray-blue eyes staring back up at me, crinkling up at the ends as his smile grew. I couldn't fathom the fact that he was thinking that far ahead but I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought about it at least once.
I shook my head a little as I tore my eyes away from his, glancing down at his hands on my waist. I couldn't bare to look at him while I was blushing this hard,
"You think we'll make it that far? Far enough to someday be married? To have kids of our own?"
His hands tensed up on my waist, causing me to divert my gaze back up to him. His smile had reduced to a tiny smirk, as if he was deep in thought as he kept his gaze on me.
Kells nodded as if he already knew the outcome, as if he had no doubt in his mind that we'd still be happy together in a few years,
"I don't think- I know."
"Lilly... Lillian,"
I sighed as I felt the shaky hand on my shoulder drag me out of my head. I blinked to relieve the burning sensation in them but it did nothing to help- I had run out of tears, anyway, it was just the feeling of the moment before they fell that was left.
I glanced over my shoulder to see Slim standing behind me by the foot of his bed. His lips were pursed into a straight line and so were his eyebrows, making him look a million years older.
I couldn't help but wonder if that was what I looked like. I definitely felt as if I aged in the past 24 hours but I couldn't even tell anymore.
An eternity could've passed and I wouldn't have even known. Time had no meaning for me anymore- absolutely nothing at all.
Slim let go of my shoulder as I trained my hard stare up at him, my fingers clutching on to the silk sheets that I used to love being wrapped in. He sighed as he rubbed the back of his neck, closing his eyes for a momentary second,
"We should get goin'... before we miss him."
I didn't respond, just turned back around and kept my eyes trained on the balcony outside. I stared at the chair that Kells had just been sitting on as I told him that I loved him. It felt like forever ago but I knew it was only a few months.
I felt my mind start to lose control as I felt it running around in circles, clutching onto anything for help. I wanted to believe this was just a nightmare but with each second, minute, and hour that passed, I knew it was really true.
I squeezed my eyes shut as I nodded, not wanting to speak to him whatsoever. He could tell I was still in my mind so he didn't bother bugging me for an outright answer, just dealing with my mourning anyway.
Slim sighed as he rubbed my shoulder again, helping me up off the bed. I was kinda glad for the help since I felt too weak to even carry myself but the last thing I wanted to do was leave this sacred place.
This room held the energy of all of our old conversations, our intermingled moans, our laughter, our everything- and it was as if he was still here.
Being in contact with what used to be his made me feel as if I still had a connection to his soul- it was a feeling I never wanted to lose.
My cold fingers clutched onto the sheets for a little bit longer before Slim forced me to let go, leading me out of the room instead.
I let him lead me down the cold hallway, allowing myself to zone out like I usually did. I focused on the new pair of jeans and hoodie that Lola had forced me to wear, something about staying in the bloodied clothes making me feel worse.
Honestly, there was nothing else in this fucked up world that could make me feel worse- this was the bottom for me, my lowest point.
I gulped down the lump in my throat as Slim led me down the stairs, our footsteps ringing in unison through the awfully quiet house.
The house used to be the life of the party, whether there was really a party or not. There was always music playing and laughs being shared but now, it was like a ghost town.
No one dared to utter a word, as if they were afraid if they spoke, they would just break down instead.
I understood that, since that's why I went mute myself. There was just nothing to do or say except cry.
Slim sighed by my ear as we entered the kitchen, my tired eyes already focusing on a somber Lola and the familiar, distraught faces of the men of the house.
He cleared his throat as he left my side, making his way to the island where a spread of shiny rifles and other smaller weapons, weapons I had never seen in this house before, were laid out in neat rows,
"Pick one."
I stared at the killing machines, taking them all in one by one before I glanced at the men standing around. They were studying me as much as I was studying them and I didn't know what to do or say.
I shrugged, stepping closer to the guns that probably had belonged to Kells. My eyes lingered on a simple, black matte handgun, some carvings at the end of the butt catching my eye.
I immediately knew it was his personal gun, the hand gun he said he had forgotten. It was a weird feeling, seeing the one object that could've possibly saved him right in front of my eyes.
The weight on my shoulders immediately grew a million times heavier as I reached out for it, my fingers gingerly picking up the heavy gun.
It felt unfamiliar in my hands but it also felt as if it belonged there, in my hands- in my possession. I didn't say a word as I stuffed it into the waist band of my jeans, shoving the band of the hoodie over it so it was hidden.
Rook sighed from next to me, his monotone voice doing nothing to help comfort me in anyway,
"You should keep it. He probably would've wanted you to have it."
I nodded once at his statement but didn't open my mouth. I just dismissed him as I took the time to look over the selection again, feeling the urge to just take all of 'em.
He deserved to be shot with each and every gun here, anyways.
I licked my dry lips as I caught sight of a dagger on top of its rightful sleeve, the glinting edge of the knife just calling my name.
I cleared my throat as I snatched the knife off the leather sleeve, studying the blade as I twirled it around,
"That's all I want."
Everyone's eyes whipped up to meet my face, their shock and surprise clearly evident in the way they glanced at each other. I guess I couldn't blame them since I hadn't dared to speak since the shit that went down.
Ryan sighed as he nodded in my direction, his own eyes lingering over the stock pile before he motioned for Rook and Slim to pick some for themselves,
"Alright, then."
I watched them immediately grab their own guns off the island as they murmured to themselves, going over the plan they had conjured up for me.
It was a pretty simple plan- get in, kill him, and get out- without hurting Ethan, of course.
I refused to hurt him since he shouldn't be punished for something his brother did- I only wanted the murderer to pay.
I sighed a little as Slim gave me the signal- it was time to go. I allowed Ryan and Rook to head out before me, hanging back with Slim to speak to Lola and Baze. I could tell she was worried and confused, since no one had bothered to tell her what we needed guns for.
But by the guarded look in those green eyes of hers, I knew that she had a pretty relative idea on what I was gonna do.
She beat me to it as she opened her mouth first, stepping up to meet Slim and I by the doorway.
Lola pursed her lips as her eyes darted between Slim and I, the worry evident in the tone of her voice,
"What's going on? Rook won't tell me anything-"
Slim sighed in response, sagging his shoulders immediately as he realized we weren't gonna be able to leave on time like we had planned.
He rubbed his temples with his fingers as he spoke down to her,
"Nothin', Lola, just stay here with Baze and don't go anywhere, okay?"
She wasn't happy with the response, I could tell. I felt my numbness subside a little as her piercing green eyes switched to me, asking me for the truth. She sighed as she laid a hand on my arm, her eyebrows knitting together as she spoke,
"Lilly, what are you doing?"
I replied to her in my head since I couldn't work up the courage to speak to her. I honestly didn't know what I was doing- I was losing my mind, hence the fact that I was about to kill one of the most important men in my life.
Or so I thought he was.
I gulped a little as I diverted my eyes from her strong gaze, knowing that she couldn't know what I was about to do. Despite hating him as much as I do, she'd never let me go through with this.
I glanced over at Slim instead, jerking my head towards the front of the house- we needed to go now.
Lola scoffed as I shrugged her hand off my arm, walking away with Slim in the other direction.
I felt bad for leaving her in the dark but at the same time, I didn't- I was doing this for myself because no one else would and I wasn't gonna let her stop me.
It's about time that I start doing shit for myself and get shit done- for myself.
I sighed as I glanced back at Lola before we rounded the corner and walked out the door, my blurry eyes focusing on her figure standing in the doorway of the kitchen.
She had a forlorn look in her eyes and I knew she was remembering yesterday, when I left her on that street like I was leaving her right now.
It was a familiar sight and it sent a pang through my chest. Being reminded of what happened tore my wound back up and it stung like a bitch.
But it also reminded me about why I was doing this in the first place- he killed my baby and he wasn't gonna get away with it.