Time Is The Key To Everything

Chapter 25: Taking One Step At A Time

"No." Both women stared at Paul. "No." He repeated, louder this time..

Cassidy's face fell. "But—"

"I said no!" He was almost shaking; in anger, in fear. It was all too much. It was too soon. Paul wheeled himself around so that he was facing the door and so that he could not see the way they looked at him.

Cassidy turned to Carmina. "Can you please give us a few minutes?" She asked. She knew that this wasn't going to be easy. Amatullah had told her to expect a fight and she was prepared for one.

"I will be in the other room." Carmina said shortly before exiting the way she came.

"Paul…" Cassidy began.

"You had no right!" His back was still turned to her and she could see the slight trembles of his body.

"I know," She said softly, "But that's not going to stop me. I want to help you."

Paul's laugh was dry and bitter and it pained her because this was the first time she had ever heard him laugh. It was not as she had expected.

"Help? Why would I want help? I don't need any help. I'm fine as I am."

"Why did you lie to me about not being able to walk?"

"I can't walk." Paul said wryly, "can't you tell by the chair?"

"Why did you lie to Antonio?" No answer. "Do you know how much he cares for you? How much he worries about you? How much they all worry about you? And you lied to them…"

"It's my life, my problems. It's none of their concern." Paul turned his head towards her and Cassidy almost flinched at the icy glare. "And it's none of yours."

"It is now. It became my concern when you played for me. It became my concern when you invited me to your house. It became my concern when you gave me a reason to be happy again!" She didn't want to cry. She couldn't fight this battle with tears, so she struggled to keep them away. "For the past 3 years, I've been alone. Gelo and James are all that I have and I don't even know if I'm ever going to see them again. It's been horrible. Having to wake up and realize that the apartment is empty and that it's been empty and that I have no idea if they will ever come back to it. The worst part is the guilt. I get to be here, safe, warm, fed, while they are God only knows where, suffering in some frozen pit! So yes, I know what it means to be alone and I know what it means to feel guilty." She stood behind Paul and slowly, laid a hand on his shoulder. He flinched but did not move away.

"You don't have to feel guilty, Paul."

"I'm not."

"You're only lying to yourself. Ama doesn't know why you won't walk but I do. I know because you told me the truth." She moved so that she was in front of him and knelt down until they were eye level. He wouldn't look at her.

"Paul." When he finally glanced up, she saw the sadness in his eyes and hoped that he saw it reflected in hers. "He would have wanted you to walk."

"You don't know that." He whispered. "I don't deserve—"

"Yes you do." She said forcefully. "He gave his life for you and you deserve anything you want. Living like this is an insult to him." She took his hands in her own. "Let me help you walk again."

"I don't know if I can."

"Bullshit." He raised an eyebrow at this. He had never heard her swear before. Cassidy gave him a sly grin. "You can and you will."

"Why are you doing this?" Paul asked.

"Because you've made me happy and now it's time I did the same for you."