Tainted Love

A Day I Never want to End part 2

I'm loving this movie I'm glad joe brought me to see it. The movie finished about 30 minutes ago and joe and I are laying flat on top of the car and looking at the stars. I decide to ask him

I say " joe how are handling your mom passing away? "

Joe says " I'm taking it one day at a time because that's all I can do love " he kisses my forehead.

I say " don't you miss her ?" .

Joe says " I miss her everyday love I mean she was my mom and I love her so much I wish she made the right choices and got clean but she didn't and that's what happens she knew what she was doing I don't know w—why she h-had to choose drugs when she has two sons that loved her and adored her but no it wasn't good enough " tears were rolling down his face.

I sat up and bent down over his face and i started to kiss his tears away and i said " she's in a better place now joe and I'm sure she loves you guys just as much as you guys love her " .

He said " I know love and don't worry I'm handling everything fine okay" the he reached up to me my lips and gave me a quick kiss and asked me

He says " how do you feel about your dad trying to come into the picture ".

I say " I don't know what to feel my mom said my dad died and I believed her because she was my mom and now I feel like I've had a dad the entire time and I didn't have to be in the situation I was in it makes me upset but then I'm glad I was in the situation I was in because I wouldn't have met you if my dad took me from my mom so I'm thankful for that because I don't know what I would do without you ".

Joe says" me either love me either "

It was dead silent and all of a sudden my stomach growls really loud and he starts laughing and my face turns red because that's embarrassing

He says " let's go get going so I can take you to go get something to eat how does that sound ?"

I say " it sounds great"

*20 minutes *

I'm day dreaming staring out the window when my phone rings and I answer it

I say "hello? "

The other person says " hello is this Aliyah Moreno"

I say " yes that's me "

The lady says " hi I'm Teresa I'm a nurse at the hospital and I have your mom here and I really don't want to tell you over the phone so can you get here as soon as possible "

I say " yes I will be there right now "

She hangs up and I put my phone in my lap and my mind is going crazy

Joe says " who was that and why do we need to go to the hospital "

I say" my moms in the hospital somethings happened to her and they need me to go to the hospital "

Joe says " okay we are almost there "

The whole way there all I can think about is what did she do to herself and how bad it is she was a bitch to me but she was still my mom and all I wanted was for her to get help and be sober but no she has to do something so stupid in jail that she lands herself in the hospital. I must have been deep in thought because joe is tapping my shoulder

Joe says " hey love ready ? ".

I just nod we walk in and immediately I'm greeted with the engulfing smell of hand sanitizer that I recognized so much out of all times I've been here I go straight to the nurses desk and

I say " hello my name is Aliyah and I got a call sayin my mom was here " trying to have balance on my crutches.

She says " oh yes I talked to you and I think you should sit down before I tell you "

I nod and walk to one of the chairs and what she says next is not what I expected

" your mom committed suicide in her jail cell "

My heart dropped even though I hated my mom I still loved her and never wished that she would have done this to herself

The lady says " she wrote a letter for you" she hands me it and I grab it .

I say " can I see her ? "

The lady says " of course sweetie "

So she take me to where my mom is and the lady opens the door for me and

Joe says " I will wait out here for you love " with a encouraging smile

I shake my head " no I want you in here with me "

He drops his head in defeat of trying to get me to see her by myself but I don't care I need his support right now. I wobble my way up to the bed where she is laying and she looks so peaceful and sober and I smile because I've been wanting to see her like this for years and the fact it happened this way hurts but she's in a better place. I feel warm tears come down my face and I lean down kiss her forehead and say

" I love you mom and I forgive you for everything and I'm sorry you had to go this way and leave things the way you did with me but don't worry I'm not mad at you I've always loved you even when you weren't nice to me you were a great mom when you were sober I wish you could've stayed longer to get yourself together but things happen for a reason It hurts to think that your not here anymore I- love you m-mom w-with a-ll of my heart and I- I wish we could've ended things on a good note but things I have to go now mom I love you and I f-forgive you" I'm crying so much I can't see right because tears are blurring my eyes .

I dropped my crutches and jumped into joes arms and he caught me and put my head on his shoulder and I cried onto his shoulder and

I said " b-babe s-she's gone I will never get to see her again and apologize for everything I said to h-her and tell her I f-forgive her and tell her I love her with all my heart I would want t-to tell it to h-her face b-babe " I'm stuttering because I'm hurt and mad.

Joe rubs my back and whispers soothing words he starts walking out the room I hear him say to the nurse

" excuse me can you please get my girlfriends crutches out of the room it's been along day and she needs to process all of this we will figure all this out tomorrow and have her moms funeral by the end of this week hopefully "

The lady from earlier says " I will get her crutches and yes that sounds like a plan see you guys soon "

As we are walking out of the hospital let me rephrase that well joe is walking out caring me he says " baby ? "

I say " hmm ? "

He says " it's okay to feel sad about these things okay shit happens but I'm here for you and I feel the same way you do I wish my mom didn't die the way she did but it just happens that way okay it's not your fault okay love ? "
I nod

He sets me down on the floor so I can get into his car and the lady gives me my crutches and now we are on our way to Matt's house and I fall asleep on the way

All I can think about is I thought this was a day I wanted to remember

End of the chapter

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