Into the Ether - Complete

The Winter of Our Discontent: Part 2

It was an odd feeling. Joy while still feeling so desperately sad. And suddenly I felt apprehensive. After all the wanting it looked like we were finally going to get our chance.

"Are you already packed?" I asked shyly, looking up at my Russian God.

He nodded. "I might need to pack a few extra things now you're coming, though," he said with a loving smile. "How about we go to my room, and I'll pick up a few more things, and then we can go to your dorm, and you can pack?"

I followed him towards the Guardian wing. It was only the second time I'd been there, the first being the evening Lissa was kidnapped. Opening his door, he stood back and motioned me inside. Looking around one could be forgiven for thinking he'd already packed up all his belongings, but I knew from last time that this was the way his room looked. Meticulously neat and clean, with almost no personal touches.

I sat on his bed, fingering the fabric of his beautiful handmade quilt. I remembered it from the night of the lust charm. How he'd laid me back on it as he'd worshipped my body. I shivered in recollection, trying to push from my mind the look of desire and adoration he'd had on his face. Noticing me looking at the quilt, he quietly commented, "My grandmother, mother, and sisters made it one winter. I love having a little slice of home with me."

"It's beautiful," I murmured, pondering how much they must love him to spend so many hours making it for him. "Have you told them?"

"Yeah. Alberta told me after practice this morning. She took me straight off shift so I came up here and made what preparations I could, including ringing home."

He said it with such a tone of finality that it made me appreciate how lucky I was to have him here to hold and love, even if it was just for a few days. I could only imagine how devastating it must have been for them to hear such news over the phone. To know their chances of ever seeing him again were minuscule at best.

He looked so stoic yet so pained. I couldn't bear it. So I stood up and nestled myself in his arms. "So what do you need to do in Missoula, Comrade? And is there anything, in particular, you want to do?"

Stroking my hair, he smiled at me. "Well I need to go to the bank and organize a few things there and I have an appointment with a lawyer on Monday, but that's it for the things I have to get done. As for wants? I want to see a movie at a cinema, not on TV. I want to take you on a proper date to a restaurant. I want to slow dance with you. I want to get really really drunk. I want to go shopping with you, and I want to sleep in."

"I think we can make that work," I said with a smile. It wasn't that I wasn't hurting, believe me, I was. But I didn't want his last weekend of freedom, our weekend, to be filled with tears. So I pushed it down, determined to make these last few days as wonderful as they could be.

He added some extra clothes to his bag, looking around to make sure everything was right before he left. "I should get some boxes so I can pack what needs to go back to Baia," he said. "Send the rest to charity."

"No." The word was out of my mouth instantly. "Comrade, just no. They have heaps of empty Guardian rooms; it's not like they need yours. Please leave it all here. Tell me what you want sent and if... if you don't come back I'll send it for you."

"I don't want you having to do that," he said softly, sadness in his eyes.

"Please Comrade? I need to know that there's a home here waiting for you, even if you don't. I know it's stupid, but while your things are here, it feels like there's somewhere for you to come back to. That there's still a chance you might come back."