Hopeless(Karma x reader)

Chapter 9

(Names) POV

It's been a week since Karma found out your secret, since than he's stuck to you like glue, never letting you be alone. He's kept true to his word and not told anyone about your little 'secret' and you actually haven't harmed quite as much. You finally felt like you could trust again, maybe.
So here you all were in class during break, the girls had warmed up to you and you really got along with Rio. She was the first to approach you actually, she said she found your eye changing abilities really cool, that helped the other people in class to start talking to you. You could feel Karma looking at you, although he was talking with Nagisa, you could still feel his gaze and it gave you that unexplained feeling What is this feeling?!? Rio grabbed your chin making you look at her as she shouted "WHAT DOES PINK MEAN I'VE NEVER SEEN IT?!?" You looked puzzled "I haven't figured that out yet, It only happened for the first time a week ago" she smirked knowing all eyes were on you two. "weren't you with Karma a week ago" you weren't sure where she was going with this (cause you've never been in this environment you don't understand these situations) "yes that is true that's when the colour first occurred? Why?" Rio was gobsmacked at how dense you were, her smirk returned after seeing Karma's face. He knew where this conversation was leading, and his face began to redden "doesn't that mean pink could be love/lust for Karma" you didn't understand why everyone was giggling and snickering so you replied neutrally "yes it could mean so, but I am uncertain as I haven't gotten the colour before. So I will have to wait and see" everyone tried to figure out if you were stupid , brave or just extremely dense potentially, all of the above.

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You were in class ignoring Korosensei trying to figure out your feelings towards Karma, but your thoughts were cut short when Korosensei called on you to answer a question. You looked at him rather bored as he asked "(name)-San please answer this history question" you looked at it and your eyes widened. This isn't normal he's teaching us assassination history, of course I know it but how does he..even being that smart he shouldn't know this much, wait this question is on my parents.... "s-sir I'd r-rather not answer that..." Korosensei looked at you puzzled "what's wrong (name)-San?" You had your head down your (h/c) hair covering your royal blue eyes, you looked up with tears touching the corners of your eyes as you said "the name of those assassins are (dads name) (Last name) and (moms name) (Last name)" a sad smile graced your lips answering the question, you stood with your bag and walked out of the class, Karma had been skipping so wouldn't be chasing you.

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You got home immediately grabbing a blade and cutting each hip 5 times, as you reached 10 you heard a knock on your door, your eyes were a dull gray (meaning you couldn't feel anything) You walked to the door opening it to see, a yellow monster standing there. You let him in as he bowed in apology your dull grey eyes scanned him as you whispered "why didn't you tell me?" He just stared at you with what would be confusion if he had a normal face "what do you me (nam-" you cut him short shouting, grey eyes piercing him "YOU! I'VE LOOKED FOR YOU FOR SO LONG HOW COULD YOU STAND THERE AND LISTEN TO ME TALK ABOUT HOW I WANTED TO FIND YOU AFTER MY PARENTS DEATH, REAPER! WHY?!?" Korosensei went to his grey face and sighed "I guess you've figured it out (name), I'm truly sorry but if anyone found out who I wa-" you cut him short again your voice low but deadly " so I'm untrustworthy!" You looked at him your eyes the the most brilliant light and dark blue mixture. He tried to excuse what he said but you cut him off again "Out!" It was deadly and commanding, he reluctantly left and once he did you broke down he's the same as everyone, he doesn't want me. I'm not needed, who would need a stupid suicidal assassin? no one. It's pointless, why should I bother, I hate him, I hate everyo- you cut your thoughts short except karma he was there for me, he's different. I really care about him and he makes a new colour come to my eyes I love it.. I love him.

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It was the next day in class you only went to see Karma not that despicable octopus, you ignored him fully until finally break came, all the boys were teasing Karma, you were going to tell them to stop when it happened. It was so quick, Karma stood up and shouted "WILL YOU SHUT UP!!! I ONLY STAYED NEAR HER BECAUSE I PITIED HER, WHO WOULDNT PITY SOMEBODY WHO HAS A SHITTY LIFE AND SELF HARMS. ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY LET YOU SEE IT PROBABLY FOR ATTENTION, I DONT EVEN LIKE HER, SHES A MURDER AND A FREAK"As soon as everyone even registered what he said they looked to where you were, well where you used to be, you had jumped out the window and bolted for the forest.

3rd persons POV

Everyone in class turned to Karma, Rio slowly walked up to him and slapped him. he grabbed his now red cheek knowing he deserved it, he did just break a huge promise and humiliate (name) ,everyone started shouting at Karma and giving out, finally someone shouted "STOP IT" everyone turned to see Okuda, her gaze lowered to the ground as she spoke "Karma only said the truth, he's always been harsh and if she can't take that, that's her problem, not his. this wouldn't have happened if you didn't tease him about the two, although there obviously Not together" everyone was surprised with the girl, but it was true they
were also to blame. Rio was very annoyed with everyone, they just agreed with Okuda we just got her to open up and you wanna shut her out again HELL NO I LIKE THIS GIRL. Rio jumped out the window and chased you.
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Rio had run for awhile so stopped to take a rest, she felt something fall on her face from the lone tree she leaned against, she looked up to see (name). Blade in hand, sliding it across her well anywhere. She saw blood drip from (names) thighs, wrists, hips, ankles and stomach. She winced just looking at (name), before climbing the tree, once she reached the top she grabbed (names) hand with the blade and stopped her from proceeding, thinking the broken girl would die from blood loss.
(Names) POV

You looked up to see Rio her hand holding the blade away from your abused arms. Your eyes were grey and you couldn't feel the cuts no matter how deep you went. Rio pulled you into a huge you couldn't tell which of you were trembling more but her words cut through you heart so easily "it's okay now (name), your not alone anymore, I've got you. Your not alone in this" she smiled at you gently and looked like she was about to cry "you wanna come to mine for a sleepover" you smiled a little and nodded, you jumped from the tree knowing it wouldn't affect you, Rio decided to jump as well but you knew it'd hurt her so you caught her in your arms showing the strength you held. You knew you had to go to class and get your stuff, so you walked back to the old building with this amazing individual I might have cut too much and died if Rio hadn't come, she's the last person I'll allow myself to trust. I will not allow emotions through to any other.

You reached your class and walked straight in, in the middle of the lesson, all eyes on you, you heard every word "is that dried blood" "does she want us to see? maybe she is an attention seeker" "god ew, she should clean herself up" Rio wanted to go in with you, but you wouldn't allow it knowing this would happen, you walked over to Rios seat and grabbed her stuff as well, you heard Maehara say "she probably doesn't wear skirts cause her legs look like shit and she can't keep them closed" you dropped everything and in a flash stood in front of him, grabbed his tie, pulling him out of his chair inches from your face your gray eyes piercing him "What was that Fuckboy wanna repeat that?" He furiously shook his head and you dropped him "thought so, got something to say have the balls to say it to my face you pussy!" You re-grabbed everything and almost left only to hear that octopus "(name)-San you can't just leave or harass your fellow classmates" you looked at him, you saw Nagisa flinch, you must've looked dead inside "you have no room to talk octopus, fine I'm leaving on an account of injury *you pull up your sleeve showing your entire arm with fresh cuts*" Octopus freaks out and asks if you are self harming and you just say "it was my cat or whatever" than walk out hearing Korosensei scream "BUT YOU DONT HAVE A CAT" you left the school with Rio to start your sleepover.