He's An Arrangement

December 23rd and 18th

December 23rd

My beard was scratchy against my face and my breath stunk. My throat was dry and my stomach growled for food. My brain had replaced everything with the police's images.

The bruises all over her body. Tattoo black and blue. Her body, her dead body, in such bad condition they won't even let me see her. People comforting me and saying maybe she's still alive.

But maybe it's better if she's dead. Was she in pain? Did she beg to die? At Least she can't be hurt anymore. I hope her death was fast. I hope she didn't suffer in her final moments. Oh, Emma.

And my daughter. Her first Christmas thrown into the trash. Her first week ending with me in complete disaster. Liam and David will end up spending more time with her than me.

What am I doing? Lying in bed at five in the afternoon.

I rolled onto my side and grunted. Nothing else matters. My whole body feels numb and worthless. Emma was my other half. Without her, I'm just the shell of a person.

Her laughter rang in my ears. Her touch pricked my skin. Her scent tingled in the air, dancing along my nose and intoxicating my whole system.

A spilled pill bottle sat on my bedside table. I reached over and grabbed a few of them. Just enough to knock me out. If I didn't have Evelyn, maybe they'd all be slipping down my throat to kill me in my sleep. But instead, I just forced my eyelids shut and punished myself with my thoughts. Of what I could've done.

I woke up to my shoulders being shaken and water being dumped on my face. I felt someone tug at my stomach, forcing what felt like a fist at it, "What the fuck?" I sat up to find Liam and David's terrified faces.

"Did you take some of these?" Liam thrust the pills at me. His face is bright red like a tomato. He had sweat drenching his forehead.

"Just a few," I grumbled and sat up against my pillows, "I couldn't sleep," I whispered without meeting their eyes.

"All you've been doing is sleeping," David said as if I didn't know that.

I forced my tired face to scowl at him, "Go fuck yourself, David. You've got no clue what I'm going through."

"You scared me, Killian!" He retorted back.

I ran my hand through my soaking wet hair, "Did you dump water on me?"

"I was making sure you were alive!"

Liam stuck his arms out between the two of us, "We have news on Emma, Killian," that's all it took to make me forget about David. Maybe they hope this will make me eat. Maybe they hope this will get me to take a shower or even just get out of bed.

"Then why are we still sitting here?" I asked the two of them, peeling their arms away from me.

This is the happiest I've felt in days.

December 19th

I cried out in pain, trying my best to kick and scream. I begged for him to stop, but he didn't. He just kept hurting me. Touching me. His hand crawled up my side, "This is what Kilian did, right?" Neal asked, pulling the knife up my scar, "He'd trace your scars with his fingers, is this a good substitute?"

Slowly, it dug into my skin and pulled up blood. What part of me doesn't hurt? My head thumps from him throwing me against the motel's wall. Both my arms have marked up them, bruises at my neck. Metal cut into my wrist and ankles. My stomach desperately rumbled for food, "Please stop," I whispered to him.

Neal lowered his face close to my skin, "I can't stop, Emma. You're like a drug," the knife didn't stop. His lips tenderly kissed my skin like he actually cared for me, "... and I'm addicted."

"You're going to pay, Neal," I spit in his direction.

"You know how many advantages I have, Emma. Even this motel is on my side," he chuckled as if my hope was the funniest thing he'd ever heard.

I fell back and let my fate swallow me whole. I ignored the pain, ignored the blood and the bruises. The way he hit me an attempt for my attention.

I just thought about Killian.

December 23rd

I played the news clip back again, trying to memorize any small detail they realised in the minute-long segment.

There was something about a motel in Tennessee. A woman that suspected a kidnapping of a blonde girl with bruises all over her body. The motel refuses to share any security tapes, any information. Police will be involved and that they'll update you on the story whenever they can.

"That's Emma," I stuck my finger at the video clip and smiled, sure of myself, "I know it."

David cocked his head to look at me, "Are you sure? What about the other girl? From the woods?"

I quickly shook my head, "No. And you know it too. You said "the other girl". You didn't say Emma."

David sighed. He adjusted Evelyn in his lap and kissed her forehead. She reached towards me, fisting her hands. I grabbed ahold of her, "I'm sorry, Princess. Your first week shouldn't be this.

"I'm going to call the police and see if they've done anything," anytime I'd talk Evelyn would look up at me with a face full of curiosity. Apparently, she's starting to recognize my voice.

Liam grabbed my shoulder and stopped me, "We already did. They don't think it's her."

I groaned and tilted my head back. Of course. Of course, they don't want to do anything. Why would they? Do they do anything? I know this is Emma, they don't know her, I do, "Why won't they?" I asked him.

"They think that the lady reporting this is just a psycho obsessed with Emma's case," Liam explained, "She saw Emma's story and took it as an opportunity. Apparently, it's common for people to try to connect themselves to cases."

"I'm going, then. I'm going to find Emma."

OoOoOOOOO

For the first time in years, I'm not excited to watch tonight's episode. The last episode was such a letdown... I was only watching for Killian, but now it's not even Killian. AND Emma's last episode barely had any Emma. Yes, I'm excited they're having a baby but we won't ever see that baby. We won't ever see her pregnant or Killian kissing her belly and talking to it. I don't know, but it really makes me want to write cute pregnant Emma and Killian since we'll never really get to see that. Maybe I'll add a one shot to "Roses". 

It just seems like they're trying to start the show over. Maybe I just need to let go of the last six seasons and watch as if I had just learned that there was a show called Once Upon A Time.

What'd you think of the episode? What'd you think of this chapter? 

-Rose