The Light At The Very End Of The Tunnel

Hope

Menna
Hate is a strong word. And while I'm disinclined towards the evil of it, I am slowly but surely becoming ensnared by the gravity of it. Nadeen's mother, Adila was the root of it. She despised me. You'd think I did something horrid to her. How can someone hate you for no apparent reason at all. Doesn't hate come with as strong a reason as it is a feeling? How is it that she can hate me, when her daughter came up with this whole charade. Was I to be blamed for a crime I had no part in? These questions simmered in my head reaching way past boiling point. And the next time she says anything demeaning about my father, I was going to-

'You girl, take these away to the kitchens.'She bellowed gesturing towards her tray of tea utensils.

'It's Menna' I said sweetly. And added a few words I usually never say in my head.

'What was that?' She asked incredulously

'My name, you know. A noun. What you use to call a person with' I explained calmly

'And what makes you think I want to know that' She asked her crinkled eyes flashing

'Seemed like you didn't know' I said with a smile. I knew my nonchalant demeanor was riling her up. I actually wanted to scream at her. I deduced that was what she wanted. To show how savage I was. So I stuck to being civil.

'Let me tell you something you filthy little gold digger. You might have Nadeen in that treacherous beggar hand of yours. But I see your true colors. So don't get comfortable. You are nothing but a phase I intend to clear out' She said her face twitching involuntarily. She said it with so much venom I almost expected fangs to flash. Her words wiped the fake smile right off my face.

'I might be poor madam. But I've never begged a day in my life' I said, my eyes burning. I swallowed, I wasn't going to crumble in front of her.

'Oh pretty Menna. Even if you haven't, your parents have. And to think they sold you over a couple of LE when you think so highly of them. Tut Tut.' She said smirking. That hurt more than anything. Because it was true. No matter how I tried to justify their actions. The truth was irrevocable. I was shipped off here so I didn't have to be a burden on them. And here I was thinking of running away. I had nowhere to go. No home to go to. I didn't even realize I was crying. I just felt my cheeks going wet.
Soft footsteps echoed as Nadeen came into the dining hall. As soon as she saw me crying, she rushed to my side. Wiping my tears and asking what was wrong. I couldn't utter a word. I felt like a large lump as big as an orange had settled itself in my throat. I shook my head wiping the annoying tears I promised myself I was never to shed.

'Come here habibaty'She said taking me to the nearest chair.

'What is it, tell me please. I can fix it' She said gently

'I dare say she misses her true home' Adila said fussing with her silk scarf

'Come on Mama, what is that supposed to mean' Nadeen said with a scowl. Turning to me, she added

'This is your home Menna.'
I nodded and croaked out

'I'd like to go to Abnub. To see my family'

'Okay dear. I shall arrange it. Firas already said you could before he left. I nodded and excused myself.

I climbed into bed. Firas' letter clutched in my numb fingers. Adila's words echoing in my head over and over again like a song on repeat. She was a vicious woman. But her final blow was true. Mama and Baba had sold me. They had let me go. Why not Ziad. But Ziad wasn't a girl they could marry off. As much as the pain of them throwing me away caused. I missed them. It was as though my heart was in pieces. Each piece on a different continent. Scattered across the Pacific. Never to be whole again. I loved them still with my whole heart. And I longed to see them again after what seemed like an eternity. For a reason I couldn't explain, reading Firas' letter helped eased the pain. In his words I find solace. I didn't feel so alone. So gut wrenching helpless. For the umpteenth time, I opened the now crumbling paper and began to read, even though I almost knew it by heart:

Menna,
I am sorry. Truly sorry for adding to your pain. I am sorry I walked away from you while you were down on the floor. I'm sorry I didn't come after you earlier that night you left. I'm sorry I didn't even care to know your name right. I know life has dealt you a very disappointing hand of cards. But I know you are stronger than your obstacles. I know nothing of you. But I know you are a fighter. It seems to me you have fallen into a world where noone is your ally. It may seem that my words do not conform to my actions. But I am here. To cheer you on whenever you are ready to take back your life. Because I see it in your eyes. That you once had a happy life. I wish for you to have that again. And whatever it is. If it is within my power, you shall have it. I may not have the softest words. Or utter the words I feel in my heart, but nothing means more to me right now than for you to be happy.
Firas

When I first read it, I didn't believe it was him. But only him could have known about me falling or that night. I actually cried when I read it. And it made me want to see him so much, it hurt. It has been more than a month now. And ever since he left, Adila moved in to support her daughter who missed her son. I found myself missing the House Of The Anubis without her in it. I tried to stay in my room if I could help it, gathering as much books from the library as I could. But Nadeen insisted on dining with them. I read the letter again. Questions thundering through my mind. What did the letter mean? And why did he have to give to me right before he left. I was falling for him when he was so far away. I knew the letter wasn't a confession or anything. But it was hope. A tiny slither of it. And I was holding on to it with everything I have.