*KENNYS POV*
I left the bathrooms and called my dad and told him what happened. He said he would pick me up because I could careless about school right now. When he arrived, I opened the passenger door and I threw my backpack in the back of the car.
"Do you want to talk about it?" He asks calmly.
"No" I reply and he nods his head.
The whole car ride is silent so I put on low music and lay back.
We got out of the car and I stormed up into my house and up the stairs.
Hours later school has ended and I start getting a lot of hate in twitter:
@kennymiller what a stupid crybaby.
@kennymiller you did not throw up did you? How retarded.👌
@kennymiller you should wake up embarrassed.😘
@kennymiller HAHAHAHAHA YOU THREW UP!!!😂
I couldn't read anymore. I ran in the bathroom, I couldn't help myself. I took a razor, the sharpest one. I stared at it constantly. 'What a crybaby' came back into my mind. 'I love you Kenny'. That's all I heard and I felt more calm. I feel so calm when she's around. She is the reason I'm still alive. 'How retarded' 'you should wake up embarrassed'. My eyes were streaming with tears and I could help but put the blade to my arm. I bit my lip and a tear falls into my mouth, the salty taste from it filled my mouth. I bit my lip harder as the blade went half an inch deep.
All that went in my head was: why live with hate? Who loves me? I've been abused and bullied my whole life, so why even keep breathing? I know I have loved ones who love me, but I don't have enough people that love me. I started moving the blade down my arm, causing myself the groan. Drips of blood fell to the floor and I started crying harder then I did before. Beth loves me so much so why am I doing this? There was a huge gap where my skin was attached. The slit was inches apart and blood started pouring out. Why am I doing this?
I dropped the blade and sat down I grabbed a paper towel, trying to wipe the wound. It hurt. So bad. I sat there and prayed.
"Dear lord, why do I always do this? Why did you choose me to be the one that got hated so bad I end up cutting myself? Why? What did I do? Seriously? I try so hard to be a good kid and I get treated like this? Can you please help me? I love you. Amen." I say quietly.
I start singing...
'If there's a god out there, please hear my prayer. I'm lost and afraid and I got no where else to go...' I sing quietly as the blood continues to escape my skin. I walk out of the bathroom holding my arm, and my dad looks at me with blazing eyes.
"KENNY WHAT DID YOU DO?" He shouts and I start crying again.
"I was getting hated on and I couldn't help it dad" I sigh.
"I'm going to beat you so hard, do you know how bad that is?" He shouts again.
"Do you know how bad society is dad? Huh? Do you? Do you understand how bad society is? If it wasn't for it, I would be living life to the fullest. You don't understand. Sometimes, suicide is the answer. I've had a long day and I've never been perfectly happy since I was first born. I was abused my mom and I get beat up at school. I had nothing else to do. If you were in my position, you would understand. You would understand that people threat me wrong. You would understand that people treat me like shit. I don't know what I did to make everyone hate me. Is it for fun? Do they enjoy it? Sometimes we suicidle kids don't have a choice" I breath. My tone screaming to calm.
"Get in the truck" my dad demands and I hop in. Whoop whoop. Another day in the hospital.
