never mind

Amnesia?

When yoongi and Namjoon get inside the hospital, it goes too mundane for yoongi's liking.

It's not like he just lost 4 years worth of memories or anything.

They register at the front desk and wait, like the other dozen patients before them.

Yoongi doesn't want to think like a prick but he's kind of panicking and lost, and fuck yeah, he thinks he's special.

Sue him!

He has amnesia for fuck's sake, and even though Amnesia is a beloved plot in fiction, it's not that common in Real Life. And this is Real life. Yoongi's life to be exact.

Yoongi had a lot of time in the waiting room to get lost in his own thoughts.

He's actually seen amnesia in a couple TV-shows. And he's starting to wonder about how accurate it is painted.

I mean he's seen in a comedy show how someone hit his head and forgot everything, and he got it all back when he hit his head again.

Is that what Yoongi should do? should he hit his head on the wall? would that solve this mess?

Nah, it was a comedy show. There's no way it's accurate right?

But then again, it would explain the headache yoongi's been suffering from since he woke up.

But that's all he's feeling. If jimin didn't tell him he had amnesia he wouldn't feel lost or panicked.

Before he went back home and had a conversation with jimin he was fine.

Other than the headache he feels okay? But isn't that what everyone says when asked how they are?

But he is okay, I mean at least he still remembers himself, his friend and his skills. He can still live normally, so at least he has that going for him.

It could've been so much worse really.

And that's when a soft female voice cut through his thoughts calling:" Mr. Min?" to find a kind-looking nurse. He stood up to follow her to find namjoon on his tail and he couldn't help but smile. He's not alone, he's safe, he's going to be alright.

Everything is going to be fine.

Or not...

For a doctor, the physician wasn't exactly calming, and having Namjoon there maybe wasn't the best decision he made.

He knows his friend is just scared and worried about him but he's not helping with Yoongi's panicking.

The doctor smiled at them and didn't look concerned with namjoon being there as well.

He greeted Yoongi and asked him how he's feeling, and Yoongi, being the idiot he is, said fine.

The doctor just gave him an amused look before asking:

" what brings you here today Mr. Min?"

"Amnesia"

The doctor looked surprised for half a sec before he schooled his expression back and said:

" Well, shouldn't I be the one to assess that? Why don't you tell me what's going on? Starting from the beginning"

" Well, I woke up today and I don't remember the last 4 years? I thought it was 2013 but found out it's not?"

"I see, any other complaints?" the doctor carried on like he was talking about the weather.

" I have a headache? Oh and I'm panicking and feeling kind of lost, but that only started after I found out I lost my memory... I had a panic attack when I found out about it"

" did you lose conscience?"

" Not that I know of, no"

" I see, well Mr. Min, Amnesia is not the only cause of memory loss, it can be a form of dementia or brain tumor. I'm gonna have to run a few tests, just to rule those out and have a diagnosis.

You might have to spend the night here"

"oh... Oka-" Yoongi was going to answer, he felt paralyzed after hearing he might have cancer, and he didn't mind spending the night when namjoon interrupted:

" Brain Tumor? Like cancer? Oh my god! Is he going to die? He's still young, how much does he have left?"

" what? No, we still don't know yet. Like I said, it's just a possibility, we have to run some tests to know... Hey, are you listening to me? What are you doing?"

And that was when Namjoon turned his head from his phone screen and faced the doctor again:

" Sorry I had to inform his Husband"

"you're married? Why isn't your husband here?" the doctor faced Yoongi again.

Yoongi just started scratching at the back of his head while mumbling how he doesn't remember him.

" Oh, I understand" and gave him a sympathetic smile but was distracted by the amount of vibrations Namjoon's phone produced.

"what did you do?" Yoongi asked because even though his friend is smart, he had a tendency to screw up.

"it's jimin, I told him you have cancer and he wants to come"

Before Yoongi could respond the doctor shrieked:

"You did what?! he doesn't have cancer, I mean, we still don't know what he has... didn't you hear anything I said?! it's just a possibility!"

"he doesn't? thank god! I heard brain tumor and I panicked. I'm sorry" but the phone kept vibrating, so the doctor just took it from Namjoon and texted jimin, to calm him down.

After that mess, The doctor pulled up Yoongi's medical history on his iPad and asked many questions to understand the memory loss and test Yoongi's thinking and judgment.

He even asked him to repeat a list of words and had it been a game Yoongi would've lost with how terribly bad he did.

But Namjoon the traitor proceeded to tell the doctor while laughing that that was the norm for yoongi and it had nothing to do with his memory loss.

Then he carried a physical examination that included a neurological exam to check reflexes, sensory function, balance, and other physiological aspects of the brain and nervous system.

When he was done, he told Yoongi that he was assigned a room to stay in and that he ordered an MRI and CT scan to check for brain damage or abnormalities, blood tests and an electroencephalogram.

He told him he should have the test results by tomorrow morning and they'll see how to proceed from there.

Yoongi just lets himself be moved from one place to another, from one test to another and he just felt detached from it all.

He felt numb and ashamed.

What happens now?

He changed so much and he's not feeling the things he should feel inside.

Everything is a mess.

Where are his feelings towards jimin? What about his feelings for Hobi? Which are his real feelings?! Where is the real him?

He's feeling so lost and it's killing him inside.

And that's how he fell asleep that day.

Alone(Namjoon had to leave when visiting hours were over when he was admitted in), in a cold hospital bed while feeling miserable and suffocated, waiting for sleep to take him.