Building A Bridge

Baby?

“How you think about a problem is more important than the

Problem itself. So always think positively.”                                                                                                                  -Norman Vincent Peale

            Tears welled in my eyes as I looked down and saw the little pink positive sign laughing at me like it was the devil himself. I dropped the pregnancy test from my hand and slowly fell to the floor in a sobbing heap. Mom and Seth were out, giving me just the right time to take a pregnancy test. Questions exploded in my mind like a firework show on the fourth of July. How should I tell my mom? What will she think? If I tell her would she be crushed, she loves him. My sobbing grew harder as time droned on.

            “Why me?” I scream at the top of my lungs, hoping the neighbors hadn’t heard. Soon my sobbing turned to hiccups and I slowly got up and disposed of the test. I had a pounding headache; my eyes were sore, puffy, and red from crying. I grabbed a washcloth from the cupboard and vigorously washed my face clearing it of any dried tears.  Throwing the washcloth into a laundry basket and turning off the lights, I quietly walked down the hall to the kitchen. The only noise was the sound of my feet slowly hitting the floor. I reached the kitchen and turned on the lights, looking around. The kitchen looked the same, as usual I don’t know what I had been expecting but everything was where it should be. Sink under the window, dishwasher next to it, the list could go on. The room was the exact way it was the last time I was in it. Maybe, because I was different, I thought other things would be different. I walked to the refrigerator and looked around in it hoping to find something to eat, there was nothing, as usual. Closing the fridge, I pulled my phone out of my pocket and called Jasper.

            “Hello?” I heard a Jasper answer, I could imagine him now with his hair sticking up in all directions and a puzzled look on his face.

            “Hey, I was wondering if you wanted to come over, I have something I need to talk to you about. And maybe bring some food like always; there is no food in my house.” I said a small smile on my face.

            “Yeah sure, I’ll come over. Any type of food in general?” he asked chuckling.

            “No, you pick, I don’t really care I’m just hungry.” I replied.

            “Okay, I’ll see you in about 20 minutes. Bye.”

            “Bye.” I said and hung up shoving my phone into the back pocket of my jeans. Jasper always brightens my mood. I walked to the couch, sat down and waited for him to get here. About 20 minutes later, I heard a car drive into the drive way, the engine stop, and the door being shut. I waited by the door, soon the footsteps stopped and the doorbell rang.

            “Hey stranger,” I said, as I opened the door and let him in. He had a bag of Chinese take-out food and I squealed in delight as he put it down. He looked over at me, chuckled, pulled me into a hug, and kissed the side of my head.

            “Hey, I see you like the food I brought,” he mused.

            I nodded my head enthusiastically and said, “Yeah, I do, now let’s eat and then talk.” I pulled out of the hug, ran to the food, and began digging in like a wild animal.

            “Whoa, easy there. You’ll end up choking or something.” He laughed, shaking his head at me. I just looked up at him and smiled cheekily. I felt him sit down beside me on the couch and begin to eat. I made no move to make conversation. I decided would talk when I was good and ready. Pretty much meaning when I was full. I finished eating, leaned back into the couch, brought my knees to my chest, and hugged them to myself.

            “So I need to tell you something.” I started slowly. Jasper looked up at my expectantly, but I could see nervousness flash through the emotions in his eyes.

            “Okay.” he replied nervously putting down his food and turning to face me on the couch.

            “I, well… I…” I stuttered nervously biting my lip. He smiled encouraging me to go on and took my small hands into his large ones comforting me. “Jasper, I’m pregnant.” I whispered slowly I saw anger overtake his expression and my eyes grew wide. “But it’s not yours, of course, and, well I was raped.” I gushed, trying to get it out before he was really mad. His expression softened and he pulled me to his chest and hugged me to him.

            “I’m sorry.” he whispered barely audible enough for me to hear. I began to cry for the second time that night. I cried for what seemed like an hour into his chest and he just sat there and rubbed circles on my back and whispered sweet, encouraging things into my ear. I finally stopped crying and looked up at him. He smiled weakly down at me and used his thumb to wipe away my tears. I smiled up at him my eyes filling with tears again but this time I was crying because I was happy and knew that he would be right by my side through this crazy rollercoaster ride I call life.

            “That’s the Janie I like to see, happy and smiling.” Jasper said, smiling his movie star smile.