Angel Valhalla

Thirty-six

Hi, I'm so v sorry for the late ass update. I've been so wrapped up in my own shit w my work, school, and my car broke down. I had a bunch of tickets for speeding and had court and had to take a bunch of driving classes:( and I had a bunch of problems going on w my bf >:( but now everything seems to be going back to normal:) and things are finally going right for me. G-d is good 💝 anyways, here's the next chapter. Thank you to each and everyone one of you that still reads this book and who votes and takes the time out of their day to read my stuff. You are awesome!! X

****

Your absence was a torment that ruptured me from the inside out when I woke up and saw the space next to me empty. My heart instantly sank as slowly my eyes grazed my surroundings. I was in my bed. The covers unraveled around me. I was cold and alone. This wasn't happening. Was it a dream? Who had stolen you away from me? Where were you? It had been real. I was naked, bare and fragile. It couldn't have been a dream, it had felt all to real. The feeling in my chest, my pulse, my heart beat, I could remember so vividly how each part of me had felt as you had touched me. As your fingertips ran down my body, and it had been heavenly and the type of touch you craved. And because I had felt like that last night, today when I didn't see him next to me, today when I had woken up after a night of kissing the man I had wanted so bad, today I felt like my soul had been ripped out of my body. I felt empty. My stomach dropped.
I looked around me frantically and confused. I had lost my mind. I pulled the duvet off and stood up looking down automatically as I heard the soft thud of something fall to the ground as a result of moving the duvet to stand up.

My eyes widened, and my lips trembled.

I crouched down and picked up the small piece of jewelry and folded piece of paper.

this was surreal. I struggled to keep my composure as I unfolded the piece of paper. My eyes darted from left to right across the piece of paper trying to make sense of everything. My heart beating rapidly with each word that I read.

I love you Lilith. I do. I'm sorry I had to leave, but it's for the best. Because I love you. It's not forever. I'll be back, when I'm a better person and can take care of you. Right now, as things are, I have nothing to offer you. I'm not good for you, I've told you since the moment I've met you. But I want to be with you, so I'm going to change that. So if you're willing to wait for me, to take me back, and if you feel the same way I do, please do not forget me. Because I won't forget you, even if I tried I could never. And I have, I've tried, but I still have the vivid imagine of when I first landed eyes on you. I play it over and over in my mind, because you were so beautiful to me from the moment I met you. And then you opened up your soul to me, and I could tell you were hurting and I wanted to make you feel better. I wanted to make you happy. And I still do, so give me a chance to make you happy. I promise I will be back for you. I love you Lilith, eternally.

- Cam

I slowly let a breath out, and looked at the piece of paper for minutes. I didn't know how to feel. Sad? Happy? He loved me he said, but what good was that love if I couldn't be with him. It was agony. Wanting to be with someone ever so badly, and not being able to even so much as look at them and touch them. I looked at the small thin ring he'd left behind. It was gold, and had a small little pearl outlined by small little diamonds. It was definitely something of his taste. I slipped it on my ring finger, and got up and I wiped away tears and headed for the bathroom where I started to run hot water.

I love you too Cam. I'll wait for as long as you need me too.

****

💘✨