The Sacrifices of Fame

Chapter Fifteen

"So there have been rumors that teen heartthrob Lauren Morgan and rising soccer star Mallory Pugh have broken up. These rumors started the day Bea Miller flew from California to Paris to see Lauren. Social media went crazy with pictures and videos of the two girls hanging out. Who knows maybe-"

•

I turn the TV off, I'm so tried of people speculating what happened between Mal and I. I don't even really know what happened between us. Its so fucking annoying, I mean its been three weeks. But what's pissing me off even more is I haven't heard from Mal since she left.

I get off the couch and walk to Mom's room. She's been my biggest support system since Mal left. I open her bedroom door and she's standing in her bra and underwear. Huh, she must have been getting dressed.

"Lauren, I'm getting dressed." Mom says.

Yup I was right. I just shrug my shoulders, not really caring. I walk over and lay on her bed. I lay on my back and look up at the ceiling just thinking about Mal and where we went wrong. I hear Mom sigh, a few minutes later I feel the bed dip. I move over so she can lay next to me. I move closer to Mom and lay on my side, she looks into my eyes and I lay my head on her shoulder.

"I thought she loved me." I whisper.

Mom puts her hand on the side of my face.

"I know baby, I know how it hurts. I know it feels endless."

I take a deep breath and all the emotions I've been bottling up for the past few weeks come out. I feel Mom squeeze me tighter and I just cry.

"Fuck, I thought she loved! Mom she told me she loved me!"

Mom doesn't say anything she just holds me and let's me cry. Mal and I had been together for over a year, she made me feel whole after Madison left. I thought I was doing the right thing by choosing her, but I guess not.

I push Mom away slightly and get out of the bed.

"Babe, if you need to take some time I understand. You don't have to be strong right now okay." Mom says.

"Mom, I've had three weeks. I'm tried of feeling like this." I say.

Mom just sighs and nods her head understandingly. I go over to Mom and give her a kiss on the cheek before leaving and going to my room. I'm not going to sit here and cry over Mal, I refuse to.

When I get to my room I grab my notebook and start writing. This is how majority of my songs start. They start as poems, then I add or remove words that do or don't sound good. From there I think about the flow of the song and what instruments I want portraying the lyrics.

I get lost in the words I'm writing, to the point where my words start becoming sloppy. I get lost in the emotions, I haven't let any of these out in three weeks. I take a deep breath and drop my pencil when I'm satisfied with what's on the paper.

I stay in my chair just thinking about everything that's been going on recently. I'm brought out of my thoughts when I hear a knock on my door. I shout a faint come in, to no surprise its Mom. She peeks her head around the door causing me to smile.

"You've been in here for hours. I know you need your space but you also need to eat."

Mom is holding a plate with a sandwich on it, she also has chips on the plate too.

"Thanks."

I get off the chair and grab my food, before laying on my bed and turning the TV on. Mom walks over and sits next to me on my bed. She's kind of all over the place, she can't sit still.