The Sacrifices of Fame

Chapter Twenty

Today is the day I'm getting discharged from the hospital. I've been here for four days and to say I'm ready to go is an understatement. Dad hasn't come back since Mom has gotten here. I don't know what's going on with him but I need to find out. Mom signs the discharge papers and there's a meeting where we talk about my treatment plans before I can go. They wanted to put me on medication but this is the first time I've experienced something like this. I'm not ready to take medication let alone accept that I've been diagnosed with depression and a few other things. Once the meeting ends I'm allowed to leave. Walking out of the hospital feels weird. I feel like the world has changed so much in only four days. We walk out the front doors and across the street to the parking garage. Once we find the car we're off. Mom doesn't say anything to me she just focuses on the road.

"Mom, where's Dad?" I ask.

Mom sighs and looks at me before looking back at the road.

"We'll talk when we get to the hotel," Mom responds.

"Hotel? Why aren't you bringing me to the house?" I ask.

"Lauren, please not right now. I promise you we'll talk about everything when we get to the hotel."

I drop the subject and turn the radio up. Bad Guy by Billie Eilish comes on and I bop my head to the beat. She's so dope I really want to meet her one day. About thirty minutes later we pull up at a hotel. Mom parks in the lot and I follow her inside. We make it to our room and I sit on the bed and look at Mom waiting for answers. Mom sighs and sits on the bed across from me.

"Lauren, your father and I are getting a divorce."

"Honestly I saw that coming but why didn't he come to the hospital? Why am I not at the house?"

"He needs space. He needs time to process all of this and it's better for him to do that alone."

"He doesn't want me does he?"

"Lauren, Serv loves you very much."

"Yeah...I bet."

"Lauren-"

"When do we go back to France?"

"In two days."

I nod content with that answer and lay down. I just want to be in my bed. I was pissed about having to go back to France with mom but maybe being there will be better for me. I sure as hell don't want to be in the states right now. I grab my phone and text Ruby.
-
Me: Hey, we need to talk.

Ruby: Okay, when?

Me: When are you free?

Ruby: I'm free now but not for long.

Me: I'm at the Holiday Inn

Ruby: Why?

Me: I'll explain everything when you get here.

Ruby: omw
-
I throw my phone on the bed and get off the bed. I grab my wallet and leave the room. There's a Starbucks across the street. I grab a croissant and a small french vanilla iced coffee before heading back to the room. As I'm walking I see Ruby's car pull into the parking lot. I walk over and wait for her to climb out. As soon as she sees me she engulfs me in a hug.

"I'm so happy you're okay." Ruby mumbles.

I wrap my arms are her not wanting to let me. She pulls away slightly and pulls me in for a kiss. I feel like I haven't kissed her in forever. I pull away and look down at the ground.

"We need to talk."

Ruby nods her head and motions for me to follow her. We turn around and sit in her car.

"So, I'm going back to France with my mom. I know we kind of just started things again but long distance relationships aren't really my thing. On top of that I need to focus on myself right now." I explain.

Ruby takes my hand and I look at her.

"Do whatever you need to do to get better. I'll always love you Ren." Ruby responds.

I smile and pull her in for a hug. Ruby and I talk for a little while longer before I head back upstairs to the room. I notice that mom isn't here so I climb onto my bed. I unlock my phone for the first time since I've been out the hospital. To say thousands of notifications roll in is an understatement. I open my camera and start to record myself.

"Hey guys it's Lauren. I know a lot of you have been worried about me and I can't thank you enough for sending me all the love these past few days. There's so many people who have recently contacted me it's just impossible to respond to everyone. I just want you guys to know I'm okay. Well, I'm getting to a place where I am going to be okay. It's going to take some time and I hope you guys will stay along for the journey. Right now I'm going to focus on me and I can't do that with social media. As amazing as social media can be, it can also be extremely toxic. So I'm going to be gone for a while. I don't know how long. It could be days, weeks, or even months. I hope you all understand. I love you guys. Bye."