Fervid Desire (Good Pleasure Series #2)

Kabanata 14

Kabanata 14

Tahimik lang ako habang nakaupo sa loob ng kanyang sasakyan. I have a qualm on riding in his car— I mean, he assaulted me with a words full of venom. So instead of looking at him, I chose to look outside the window, reclined my back on my seat and wait until I calm myself.

His words are very hurtful that I couldn't even breathe normally, I was totally crippled by his words. A ball of anger was making my stomach churn. I wanted to shout at him more but I felt no energy at all. He said that he didn't mean those words but what the hell? He just spitted it in my face and rubbed it until it subsided into my veins, making me feel so low leveled.

Anong akala niya sa akin? Not because I was letting him fuck me, that doesn't mean I was already a filthy slut that wants enormous dick inside me. That thought urged my tears to fall again from my eyes. My life was such a great catastrophe, where I could find my own euphoria? I was a totally unwanted damsel to my own family... I think, Drook was the only person I know who could protect me, to give a refuge on a wretched damsel like me— but why I couldn't feel the safety of a harbor towards him? Damn, what I was thinking?

I wobbled my head just to take myself from my trance. I craned my head to look at the road who has such a sublime view. I didn't know that this kind of periphery was still subsisting, I thought I was only looking at the pictures in a magazine. Well, I had dreams for a places that I could see only to a secluded places— away from modernization. Bizarrely, I wanted to experience the old ways of living, a place that has no internet connections, a current, and a transportation machines that causes pollution in the community. But I know that it was hard to find a place like that— maybe in mountains wherein I could see some indigenous people. If I had enough budget, I will fund a feeding program for the kids in a chosen place. I hope I can make it real, though.

We reached the condominium building with a dripping silence. When he hopped in on the ground with his feet, he trotted toward the door beside me but before he could open it for me, it was already too late because I already opened it myself. I just threw him a cold gaze before staggering away from him. I heard him curse but I just ignored him.

"Blair," he called out my name— it was like a whisper for me.

I kept my mouth shut. I will not talk to him, not now that it was still fresh. So I continued on striding toward the elevator. I need to get in but I don't want to get stuck with him inside this suffocating elevator, mas mabuti sana kung isa-isa lang. Damn, I really need some space para hindi ko masampal ang lalaking katabi ko ngayon na naglalakad.

His voice was annoying as always. Pinagpatuloy niya ang pagtawag sa aking pangalan pero nanatili lamang akong nakatingin sa dadaanan ko. When I reached the elevator, I pushed the open button and thankfully, it immediately opened. Pero sa tingin ko ay po-problemahin ko na naman kung gaano katagal akong mananatili sa loob kasama siya. Pumasok ako at sumunod naman siya. He nestled himself next to me, I moved away from him.

"I'm sorry..." he whispered, "Look I was ju—"

I immediately cut him off, "Don't start. I'm tired now, Zach."

"But I don't want to end this day without us being okay..." he whispered.

I wanted to say: ayaw mo pala, e? Ba't mo sinabi 'yon kung alam mong makakasakit sa akin? But I just bit my lip to restrain myself from talking.

"Blair, please say a word. I'm fucking worried."

I just shook my head and the door of the elevator slid to open. I strode briskly, hoping that he won't be able to get inside my pad. No'ng makarating ako sa bukana ng unit ko ay muntik ko ng mahulog ang aking susi. What is happening to you? I asked mentally to myself. Pero no'ng nabuksan ko na ay huli na ang lahat dahil nasa likod ko na siya, naghahanda na sa kanyang pagpasok.