Loving This Bad Boy

secrets with emotions everywhere

Jason

Violet was curled up on me when I woke up I didn't want to wake her so I just stayed there. I waited until she woke up when she did I guess she was startled because she jumped off.

"Are you good" I asked "yeah umm sorry" she blushed "it's okay I know I'm pretty huggable" I grinned "yeah but I probably caused you to lose your breath of how big I am" she said making me mad. Why was she talking about herself like that "stop that no you didn't it" I frowned

"It's true your just trying to be nice" she sighed

"Noo your not big or fat your beautiful and I like everything there is about your body"

"I...i...thank you?."

"Your welcome"

"Why have you been so nice lately" she asked I DO NOT EVEN KNOW WHY HAVE I??? "I don't know" i said honestly "is it because you have to" she looked sad "why would I have to?"

"I'm giving you a home to sleep in and you need it so your being nice because you have no other choice" she sighed

"No never that's not it I just can't explain it" I say

"Oh..."

"I'm being sincere it's just you don't judge me you treat me like a normal person. I don't even realize I'm acting different it just happens"

"Like I said I would never hurt you" she said I love when she says stuff like that

"Thank you" I touch her cheek

"No problem" she smiled.

Would I ruin the moment if I kissed her? oh fuck it I'm just do it I got closer to her. Our lips connected I got so I was sort of on top of her. I was holding myself up with one hand and the other was on laying on her thigh. She put her hand on my neck and her other just touched the side of my waist.

I kept licking her bottom lip but she wouldn't budge...fine we can play that game. I squeezed her thigh and she gasped giving me an entrance. I took it and her hand went under my shirt and she still touched the side of my waist just it was under my shirt. My hand started to play with her shorts and her other hand kept going really low.

It made my body go all nervous like always. I always get nervous when I'm making out like this is partly because I'm a virgin. And I guess I'm a virgin because I get nervous god I'm stupid.

(A/N okay i know a lot of you will have mixed feelings about him being a virgin and what not. At this point i don't care like my friend said it's my story and i can do what i want. Yes Guys a bad boy or player can be a virgin idc idc.)
CONTINUING...

I mean sure I've had oral and what not but i have never had sexual inter-course. No one knows that not even my friends or family except me of course. I don't know what happens I tense up and freak out so bad but I always end up giving the girl a shitty excuse.

I'm brought back to reality when she was about to put her hands in my jeans OH NO I CANNOT do this FUCK!!!

"Uhh we should get up before your mom walks in" it was the only excuse that came to mind. Shitty right?!!!

She looked confused and upset "oh okay" she wouldn't look at me. Hopefully she doesn't think it's her fault

I got off her and adjusted my jeans she sat up and she was quiet but quickly faked a smile. I'm so stupid what the hell is wrong with me i can do anything but not lose my fucking virginity!!!!???

We went downstairs

We ate but she ignored my presence the whole time she went upstairs and FaceTimed Noah. Yes I know they still talk all the time they may have broke up but they're like best friends now.

I went upstairs after watching like 5 movies it was night time I couldn't take it anymore "yes" she said as I went in "can i speak to you" did I say speak really Jason!?

"Oh okay...I'll talk to you later and make sure to loose that bet because I don't plan on loosing" Noah told her and she rolled her eyes. What bet? Oh whatever it's not important right now and damn they've been talking all day

"I wanted to talk about earlier" I said

"What are you going to say that it was mistake? You were disgusted with me? I mean I understand Jason I'm not like every girl your with. I'm ugly and not perfect you didn't want me" I saw a tear rundown her cheek

She has it ALL WRONG I'm not disgusted and I'm really angry again that she's talking about her body again. Okay Jason focus you can do this you've done worse all you got to do is tell her the truth. Easy right? Well the truth about other stuff you being a virgin can stay irrelevant for a while.

"No no and NO you can never disgust me and yeah your not like every other girl I have sex with. Your special you make me feel special... I hate when you say that just no stop that's bullshit" I said sincerely she is like no one I'm with but like basically I've never been with anyone

She sighed "Me make you Jason Hunter the bad boy, street fighter, and not to mention 2 of the baddest gangs were no wait technically one still is after you. Your telling me I make YOU feel special couldn't you have come up with something more believable..."

I was a little mad that she thought I was lying. This is so hard "it's the truth okay I'm not lying I know it sounds weird but it's the truth." The first time I say how I feel or for that matter the first time I feel like this at all. Is the time they don't believe me like doesn't she see how difficult this is for me.

"Jason it's okay" she sighed

"No it's not" i said extremely frustrated now she wasn't believing me

"Yes it is..." i interrupted her dumb comments by smashing my lips with hers. I kissed her gently and slowly pulled away "you got to stop that I know it's hard I have a reputation I can't change what is said about me. But I want to show you I'm not what they say and if I can't tell you with my words I will show you with my actions"

"I..."

"Don't say anything...goodnight beautiful see you tomorrow" I kissed her cheek as I left her room.

Was that me in there?? I don't know where this side of me came from maybe it's been sleeping my whole life. These emotions are scary I'm not sure how I feel about them yet. All I know is I meant every word I said in there...

I went to sleep just thinking about the beautiful person violet is.