Poems By A Clueless Girl

To the First Boy I Ever Liked Kissing

There are small pink balloons i wear in between my neck and my stomach
That i wish would pop
B

e squished by the very hands

Your hands
that squeezed at them any chance you got
Toyed with me till my cheeks clenched stuffed with strawberries and beckoning flesh
I tucked the sweetness under my tongue so that you may think i swallowed it whole
Will you go searching for it?
Went right through me
No different from the girl before you knew me
But this isnt the case
Instead I hid your whispers and recipes for tender presses
Until the next day you decide we are better left as friends
My lips had been overlapped by your mouth and your head knocked mine back
Until i was almost completely laying across the bench we spent time catching up on
And if your wondering if this is what i meant by catching up
Then you must be referring to the way I had never looked at you as someone who wants it badly before
The way I looked at you in those moments when my third eye was at the tip of my tongue
I let you be aggresive
I let you make me feel defenseless
Because you were a 24hour flower
Not made to last long at all
In fact I traveled two days and 2 band tickets just to see you bloom
maybe catch a glimpse of your beauty
And at the time
It was worth it
Even when you had to get back on the buses
And my mom was waiting for me in the car
You kissed me one last time
Even harder
Grasping first at my waist and then onto my cheeks and not the ones that get grabbed often
We swayed and this was new territory for me
Fresh sensation your torso is the heating pad to match my blushing
You let go of me
We said goodbye
When i got back to the car you had already sent me a text asking
Does it feel like you've captured butterflies?
I responded with
My face is the home of a day spa
And my lips are as hot as a sauna
You said
Same here
That night I ended up requesting that I go to your prom half across the world
You ask
Wont the trip be too far?
I say
Not if you tell me yes
You say you'd love seeing me even without a dance or a song that all you needed was my body
No music
My touch
Then you ask me what i'd do with you if I was there right now
Back then it seemed like a compliment
Like all you wanted was my company and the rest was just part of the ride
I ask you if youd consider going out and you say maybe yes
I call the next day and ask directly
The coaster is having a staring contest with the tracks below
its too far a distance
you really like me but its not worth it
And i guess i should've realized that when you never got my jokes
When I'd pay you my interests and you'd spend them on more questions
Like why would such matter to you
With me thinking
Why wouldn't it
When all you care about is what you can feel physically when there are so many other layers to the human being
I thought maybe you had those layers
But like you I was curious by your lip curls and chocolate chip dimples you had when we were kids
How delicious they might be now
And how I always used to call you potter cause of your glasses
But now only add to your edge
I was dazed by your beauty sure
But caught offguard by your blindness
To not be able to see the same in me
Is like missing out on a carnival ride thats on its last day-trip
Popped popcorn with no kettle in the title
Salt without the flavor
And Mr.Beauty
I'm sorry
But when I shut my eyes tight to get a good look at you
I know that you're tasteless