"What if?"
That's the question that runs through her mind; day and night.
"What if I leave? Will anyone come for me?"
"What if I stop talking? Will they ask me what's wrong?"
"What if my parents were happy? Would I be like this?"
"What if I didn't argue with my brother? Would my Mom be less stressed?"
"What if I never went to school again? Would they notice I'm gone?"
"What if I was never born? Would my parents still be together?"
"What if I was happy? What would I be doing now?"
"What if I tell anyone this? Would they judge me?"
"What if I tell my friends that I cut? Would they think I'm a freak?"
"What if I slapped that bitch in the face? Would I get in trouble for it, or a pat in the back for it?"
"What if I went to paint? Would I feel a little calmer?"
"What if I take those acting classes? Would I get over my stage fright?"
"What if I get discovered? Would I be put in a T.V. show?"
"What if I become famous? Would my Mom become proud?"
"What if I'm famous, and someone asks about the white lines etched into my skin? Would I tell them what I had done and why?"
"What if I do drugs? Would I feel detached from the world?"
"What if I fell of the face of the Earth? Would people come find me, or would they just not care?"
"What if I fail? What would I do then?"
"What if I pass? Would my Mom be proud?"
"What if talk to someone? Would I feel better?"
"What if I took the pills the doctor ordered? Would they work?"
"What if I die? Would anyone miss me?"
Her mind spins from all the thinking she does. It goes in circles, never getting to a conclusion. She doesn't know what to do. She just wants to be happy again.
Why can't she be happy again?
"What if I can never be happy again?"
YOU ARE READING
Away
Short Story"Sometimes when I say 'I'm ok', I want someone to look me in the eyes, hug me tight and say, 'I know you're not'" -Unknown
