Breaks

Happens so fast

I pressed my lips harder against his as he pushed me against the wall with his hands on my waist. I opened my eyes realizing what was happening. I didn't want to push him away though. This could never be. I liked him a lot, but I didn't understand why. I kept my eyes open as he kissed down my neck.

I could tell it was late by the deserted halls. I pushed him away from me, not forcefully, just so he could get the message. I stared at the ground unable to look back up at him at all cost. He just sighed and began to speak, "I'm sorry Alek, that was stupid of me." A small smile edged its way across my face. I glimpsed up at him in out awkward silence and sighed, "it's alright."

He sighed once more before saying, "maybe we could talk later, you need to sleep." I nodded as I heard his foot steps trailing off as he exited my room and lock the door behind him. I kept staring at the ground wondering why he would want to do that to me. Sudden rage started to go through my veins I didn't know why, it comes unexpectedly. I started to pace back and forth around the room with my hands behind my back mumbling words to myself.

Thoughts of hate blazing through my mind just wanting to hurt myself more. I could hear the screams of others, all I wanted to do was scream with them letting the unknown envy escape me. I stopped mid thought staring at the ground remembering all that just happened and now this. I smiled to myself thinking if everything in life goes by this fast, please let my life end sooner.

I look up and see nothing but a pale light flickering in my room. This is all that my life is going to be like isn't it? Shivers went up my back as I tried to erase everything in my mind at this point. Trying to do that just brought back more memories, but ones of my child hood. I remember having to go to a terrible school where I was hated by all and treated like shit. To be honest, those were the best days where I wasn't locked up and starving to death. I remember having to read a poem infront of the class and getting laughed at when the teacher came up patting me on the back saying, don't forget the parts next time. That poem is now engraved into my mind since then, I remember every word, I started to mumble it to myself.

Natures first green is gold,

Her hardest hue to hold.

Her early leafs a flower,

But only so an hour.

So leaf subsides to leaf.

So Eden sank to grief.

So dawn goes down to day.

Nothing gold can stay.

I don't remember why I had to learn that, I just remember the laughs and hatred going around the room towards me. I shake my head furiously trying to forget the horrible memories. Pain starts rushing through my body rapidly. I grasp my head in my hands pulling on my hair just creating more pain. My mind has gone blank, I can't think of anything. My body feels like its burning into ashes. I throw my shirt off my body trying to cool my heating body. The pain still rushing through my head added on.

I scream as it felt like I was being stabbed many times in the back with knives. I fall to the ground rolling and screaming. My eyes were stinging with pain, but I could still see everything around me. The pain in my back is now all over my body and I cant take it much longer.

I run over to the mirror pounding it, shattering the already broken glass. It sent shocks of pain up my arms each time. I couldn't feel the cuts and bruises in my hands, but I knew they were there from the blood I could see. I look at the ground that had shattered glass and blood covering it. I pick up a broken piece of glass and glide it across my arms many times until the blood flowing out was non-stop. I didn't feel anymore pain in my body as I collapsed to the floor. The last thing I remember were hands shaking me, before I saw nothing. Everything happens so fast.