Damaged -Grayson Dolan-

Chapter Seven

When I opened my eyes everything was blurry.

I blinked several times and gradually the glow of the TV came into focus. A different movie was playing. I ran a hand over my face.

"Have a nice nap?"

I jumped and realized it was Grayson who I was leaning on. I'd fallen asleep on him. My face probably would've flamed scarlet if my chest hadn't begun to tighten at the close proximity we were in.

"Uh- yeah," I managed to get out, twisting to look over my shoulder at Mina. She was still sitting next to Ethan, peering at her phone screen. My hands began to shake. "I'll be right back," I told Grayson nearly jumping up from the couch and sprinting out of the room. He didn't even have a chance to answer before I was gone. I figured out where their bathroom was just as I began to grow dizzy. I sank down onto the cool, tile floor and pulled my knees up to my chest.

Why did I always manage to ruin everything?

A knock came at the door. "Alanna? Don't worry, it's just me." Mina's voice sounded.

I didn't answer- I couldn't. My throat felt so tight I thought it would explode. Mina kept quiet on the other side of the door. She understood, she'd seen me have panic attacks before. The feeling grew and my breath grew shorter, coming in pants.

"Okay, it's been 10 minutes. I'm coming in." Mina pushed open the door. My usual panic attacks peaked after ten minutes or so and then I was able to function again. The bad ones lasted 20 minutes and if they exceeded 30 minutes then I was in serious trouble.

She stepped into the dimly light space and closed the door quietly behind her. She sat down on the floor, a good ways away from me. "Just breath," she told me calmly. "In and out, count in your head."

The burning in my lungs began to lessen and I uncurled from my position. "Fuck," I muttered.

Mina began to laugh but it sounded forced. Her smile didn't reach her eyes. "That's the first thing you have to say?"

I shook my head and immediately regretted the motion as the room spun around me again. "Why does this happen?"

"Because you went through something awful and traumatic, Alanna. You can't expect there to not be repercussions."

We fell silent for a few more minutes. The only sound was my labored breathing, slowly returning to normal.

"What was the trigger?" Mina asked, eyes sliding down to her phone screen.

I shrugged. "I woke up too close to Grayson I guess. I'm not used to that."

"Yeah, since you were practically on top of him," Mina added with a smirk.

"Oh no," I buried my face in my hands. "That's so embarrassing."

"Relax, it was cute. I think he thought so too."

I peeked out from between my fingers. "Really?"

"Really," she answered putting her phone away. "Ready?"

"I guess." I nodded. "What am I suppose to say?"

Mina looked at me. "You don't want to tell him?"

"No!" I lowered my voice. "No way."

"Okay, well I guess it's up to you then." We rounded the corner and started down the steps to the basement. I heard the twin's voices before we reached the bottom.

"... I know she is, dude."

"I told you so. And you never listen to me."

Mina cleared her throat as we entered the room. The twins turned to look at us. "Hey, you good?" Grayson asked me as I padded back over to his side of the couch.

"Yeah, I just wasn't feeling too hot when I woke up." I shrugged. "Didn't wanna risk it."

"Aww shit," Mina said. She held up her phone. "My mom wants me home in time to take my little brother to his soccer game."

I glanced at the time. "It's fine, my parents will probably be wanting me back home anyways."

Grayson stood from the couch and stretched, his shirt lifted up to reveal a sliver of toned torso beneath it. I quickly glanced away. "Do you need a ride back?" He asked.

"No, it's okay. I drove us." I answered.

Ethan collected the pizza boxes and we trooped up the stairs. "See you guys on Monday," I said over my shoulder as we stepped out onto their porch. The air was even colder now, the sun dipping low in the sky.

"Oh yeah-" Mina stopped and rubbed her arms. "You guys should sit with us at lunch."

Grayson glanced at Ethan and Ethan grinned. "Sure. We've just been sitting with each other since the fall."

"Yeah, now we can stop having only each other for company," Grayson said as he leaned against the wall.

"Whatever," Ethan retorted rolling his eyes. "We'll see you on Monday."

Mina and I climbed into my car and I started the engine. Mina flipped on the heat even though the air that blew out was cold. "That was fun," she said. "I hope we do it again."

I backed out of the driveway and turned to look at her with my eyebrows raised. "Again? I take it you and Ethan hit it off?"

"Maybe."

I shook my head with a small smile as we drove home.