I put on my skinny jeans, a panic at the disco t-shirt, and tied my hair up in a bun.
Not too much effort. These people haven't spoken to me in months. They all took dans side, and I'm just "that girl who broke dans heart".
This is going to be difficult.
If Sophie's there. If Sophie's there then, well, that's gonna be awkward.
I hope she is beautiful though. I hope she is smart, and honest, and loving, and hilarious, and everything that dan wants in a woman.
Everything that I couldn't be.
For what seemed like...was...the first time in months, I knocked on Phil's door.
Phil answered, smiley, and wearing a colourful shirt.
"You came!"
"I was literally threatened"
Phil pulled me into a hug. I wish I was taller. This would make these moments, these sweet moments, less awkward, so phil wouldn't have to bend down awkwardly to hug me, and dan wouldn't have had to crouch to kiss me.
Stop thinking about that Emma
"Come in"
I stepped in the door like I had done so many times before, yet this time it seemed so unfamiliar.
"Everyone's in the lounge"
"Thanks" I said at phil, glaring at him, in a "This is gonna hurt" kind of way.
"You will thank me later"
"No I won't, I will spell it in tears"
Phil put his hands on my shoulders, and looked me in the eyes.
"Emma. Trust me. I got this. You got this. We got this....trust me"
I walked into the living room.
"Emma!" Pj came running at me and pulled me into a hug.
"How are you?"
Be happy Emma.
"I'm good! How are you?"
"I'm good!"
"Chris!"
"Hi Emma!"
We hugged
It's funny how all of these people don't give a shit about me, but then I come into a room, where they are forced to say hello to me, and suddenly they are like "oh my god you have a phone? I had no idea".
Fake
That's what they are.
Everybody but phil.
"Have a seat Emma"
I looked around the room, chris, pj, Phil, dan, Felix, Marzia, but no new faces. Maybe she's in the bathroom?
She's probably in the kitchen, she's probably a world wide famous chef.
But there were two seats left.
One on either side of dan.
Either dan smells, or this was set up.
I sat down next to dan, and glared at phil. He just laughed. Below his beautiful, innocent demeanour, he was mean. He really was.
I felt like I was dying.
Everything I wanted was right beside me.
Yet so far away.