Colours. (finished)

Rain, and the blues.

Yamaguchi

As the weather gets colder the voices get louder.
Shops already playing holiday music. People talking too loudly about said holidays.

I shouldn't be upset but it's like this every year, I don't want the summer to go or the fall to leave.

Even if its still fall.

There's still too much rain, and too much time alone, I'll hear my mom and Mao talking in hushed voices when they think I'm sleeping.

The rain is comforting, the pitter patter against the windows, the smell of rain and fall, it'll often come down, and won't stop until the next day, too loud to sleep, too quiet to miss it.

I thought of him too much but still felt like too little.
He shouldn't still be on my mind after all these months, but maybe it's normal because he was my first everything, and he didn't make me feel so alone. Even when I'm surrounded by people I love, and should love.

I am painting, no music playing, just rain as a soundtrack. I knew today I was painting with blues because I asked Mao to only put blues on the wood. I didn't normally ask these things, but today I was feeling blue, blue as in the colour. Maybe, all the rain was getting to me.

I wanted to paint him, but I knew it would look like a blob of nude, brown, and blond.

I didn't need to see to know that.

There was a knock at my bedroom door, it creaked open.

"Hey, bud," My mom said from behind me.

I nod.

"What's with all the blues?" She asks.

I ignore that and keep painting.

"Mao and I are going out for date night, is there anything you need?"

"No,"

"You sure?"

"Can I have your phone?"

"Sure? Call Mao if something happens or if you need help, ok?" I hear the clank of her phone as she puts it on my desk beside me. She ruffles my hair.

"Ok."

Tsukishima.

I'm starting to be pissed at the weather, I'm standing under a bus stop, glaring at the clouds.

The rain has been non stop all week, and I was done with it.

Even though I have a lot of memories of Akiteru and I playing when all the rain came. We hardly were inside when the time came.

I checked my watch, the bus was late by five minutes. There was nowhere to sit, all being filled my grandparents or children and mothers. I was leaning on the doorframe into the sad little sitting area.

I didn't bother to check my phone when it chimed in my pocket. It was probably my mother, or my father telling a bad joke with too many spaces, or him telling me we need milk even though it was hiding behind everything.

I know it's not Hinata or Kageyama as they went home together so they are busy making out right about now.

The bus finally pulls up, I'm the first on, I head all the way to the back, turning my music up more to block out the rest of the people on the bus.

I stare out the window as all the blurred lights go by, one after another neon sign after neon sign.

My head throbs to the beat of my music, I've had this headache since this morning, it's getting worse as time goes on. All I can think of making it feel better is sleeping for ten hours, but I can't I have homework, and parents.

When the lights make my head feel worse, I get my phone out, changing the music too fast for me to even process what song is playing. I stop when a piano starts playing.

I unlock my phone going onto the messaging app, the one message I have.

Yamaguchi's mom: I shouldn't still be thinking of you.