Colours. (finished)

Noises, and deathly quiet.

"You need someone to take care of you, I don't care if you think you can do it by yourself or not, you're blind this is how it should be." Her voice filled with distaste and hatred. "I need to find someone this week, we're leaving this weekend, of course, you had to go and make Aina quit!" My mother's voice rings out, her tapping angrily on her laptop.

"This is the sixth one this year. I swear to God, that this will be the last." She mumbles under her breath.

She wasn't always like this, but I guess having a kid like me drives you up the wall after a while.

I don't respond to her, knowing I'll just make things worse.

I haven't been helpful since I lost my eyesight. I've only gotten in the way. Or that's what I've been told. I wasn't even that good with my eyesight.

It hadn't gotten better when he left either, it had all blown up in my face.

I rub my hands on my knees quietly praying she'd leave the room, or I could leave. Yelling never helped.

She never really helped though, her voice always traveled too good, either if were separated by rooms her voice always found a way to my ears.

"I have to make a few calls, don't leave this room Tadashi," She warns, her heels clicking on the way to the kitchen.

It's not like I could even if I wanted to mother.

I stay where I am not daring to move even an inch, the only sound in the room is the quieter rumble of my mother's voice.

She sounds stressed, I can tell from the sound of her voice she's venting to one of her friends yet again. Something about how I can't be left alone, but I can't go with her either.

"I just don't understand him, he never talks, he just sits there, saying and doing nothing! I wish he'd get mad and yell or something,"

I may be sightless but I still hear perfectly mother.

"No, I can't find his father anywhere, I swear after the divorce he disappeared," She states, sounding calmer than before, her voice trails off when she leaves the kitchen for her room.

I stay in the small living room still not knowing my way around the house after we moved, we did live in a decently big house before my parents split, now we live in a small apartment with an almost always broken elevator.

I relax a little though from her locked in her room. I rest my head on the back of the couch. trying to see through the blackness everything now. I remember colours, I remember being in love with them, the way the flow and change into one another.

I never liked the dark much, the shade or the blackness of my bedroom at night.

Now it was a constant, everywhere I turned my head, it felt as if I was being followed by my worst nightmare.

I haven't left here in months, I can't remember what it's like to have grass under my feet.

When I hear the clicking of my mother's heels once more, I sit up straight, staring at where the noise is coming from.

"I've found someone, know let's get you ready for bed, so I can relax." She finishes I hear her kicking off her shoes.

A hand around my wrist a moment later, being pulled to my feet.

We walk a little. "We're at the stairs," She said softly, her voice now in her nighttime pitch.

I follow her blindly up the stairs, gripping tightly on the railing.

She's now humming under her breath as we walk. Her humming helping slightly.

"Landing,"

I nod to myself, stepping up once more.

I hear the soft click of a door opening. "We're in the bathroom," She lets me go handing me a toothbrush a second later.

"The person who's going to take care of you is one of my friend's son's, it's not ideal, but it'll have to do," She states. "But I really need this, if I get this job we can move there. It'll take months but it's going to be worth it,"

I nod hoping that's enough.

My hand resting on the cool sink, I finish brushing, her taking my wrist once more leading me down the hall, not saying anything. It's calm. It's too calm for her. She's of, course, got a lot on her mind.

I feel the softness of carpet under my feet, meaning we've made it to my room. She leads me closer to where I assume my bed is. Letting me go once more so I can sit.

"I would normally send you to your father's but no, he had to go and run off with some girl." She mutters to herself. The clicking of the door closing behind her as she leaves.

I sit there a moment longer, lying down a minute later. I close my eyes.

Thinking this time when I open my eyes, everything will blossom into colour. Crossing my fingers, praying to a God I never believed in. Anything to see, anything to create again.

I open them once more, I blink a few more times, hoping it worked.

I always get sad when it doesn't, but I should be used to that by now.

<----------------------------------->

The last week of my mother taking "care" of me went by in a blink of an eye.

Right now I'm seated on the couch next to said mother, I tell she's anxious (Something I sadly get from her,) from the air of the room and the tapping of her heels. She keeps mumbling under her breath about how she's going to be late.

I reach out for her, finding her hand somehow, taking it in mine to try and calm her down. And hopefully sending a reassuring smile her way.

I wish I could say I'm going to miss her, but some part of me still blames her.

Her mumbles grow quieter into nothing a minute later. "He's going to make me late,"

"Then just go," I said quietly, my voice coming out too soft and shaky from months without use.

She doesn't say anything, "I guess, I'll have to," She continues a while later.

She releases my hand, "I'll leave the key under the matt and message Chouko," She states, kissing my forehead quickly in goodbye, I hear the rolling of her suitcase and tapping of her shoes on the hardwood. "I'll call you tomorrow. Remeber use your words," She said, the shuffling of her putting on her coat than opening the door. "Goodbye, dear," She said, closing the door with a slam as she leaves.

I sit there in the dark, alone. The apartment now deathly quiet.

I sigh, thinking of all the times this happened before, all the times I was left alone in the dark, even before the accident.