inspiration story...(Completed)

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I'm going to write again a poem because I have no life.
Once again I feel so mixed up and mostly my emotions would play with me as I know nothing else...
Like mentioned before I could never have you...
Any day spent with you is my favorite day.
I don't think as much on how hard it is to commit. Especially when I just so afraid that someday I'll lose you.

I been through many pain already. And being left behind is one of them...
I was indeed happy when you become honest of your feelings but the fear of losing you is still here.
Doubt might suit the situation I feel right now.
There is still something that in me that changes the way I see everything.
My feelings for you is deep and true.

But the fear of being forgotten and being left is still here...
Your too good for your own sake.
I guess I have no other choice but to accept the fact that not even you can stay.
Your feelings aren't forced. And that's the only thing that keep you going. Mine isn't either.
Some times I felt as If I'm playing a mere game.
And is capable of losing already.

Because the only weakness I have is losing you. Predicting the next bad thing I couldn't continue being the person that can out smart faith and destiny when it's you that they're using.
Time is my enemy.
So is destiny and faith.
I cannot do anything to ever stop this game but to finish it is the only thing I can do.
Feeling caged in the world of darkness.

Wingless creature is what the world see me as...
Back injured as I give my last wing to those who needs it. I was injured and cold as I was trap in the never ending dice rolling.
As they play I stood motionless and cold.
I lost everything...
I lost everyone do dear to me...
I feel as If I was defeated.
Watching you leave is the last thing I'm scared to do.

Watching you walk away while I can't even do anything to stop you. Begging for you to stop and crying as I couldn't move an inch.
The game continue as I watch you disappear from my sight. I knew that it would happen again.
The game continued without anyone knowing how painful it is to lose you.
I looked for ways to think of something else but my prediction is just too real to even move on.

I would push everyone away in fear that they too would be drag into this never ending game. Of me against the world.
Two bullets and a bunch of sharp things are tossed into my chest as I let it pierce tightly into my chest.
So tight that I let my heart bleed. I could care less.
I stare emotionless as they continue to torture me.
The pain however is still unbearable.

The action or practice of inflicting severe pain on someone as a punishment or to force them to do or say something, or for the pleasure of the person inflicting the pain.
Yet In the other view I was fine.
Still alive and lying.
Waiting for another one to take pity and try to smash the mask I am wearing.
But non came and take it off for me.

The December air grew cold as I blend in and freeze as a cold statue. Still standing helplessly in the side walk.
A simple help me is not being heard by a naked ear.
Like princess lock into a tower or a princess that sleeps for a long time.
Except I am no princess. I am a mere player of a game I force myself to win.

Words and poems are the only thing that I can use to voice my mind that my mouth can't speak out loud.
No I am not a deaf nor will I be mute.
I'm just simply lost and tired of everything as If I've seen this over and over again to even predict what happens next.
Needless to say I'm used to all the pain as If I been into one before.

Like I loved you before...
But as the cycle repeats the clock ticks a happy ending wasn't what happened to the two people forbidden by faith and destiny.