inspiration story...(Completed)

my last poem goodbye...

my last poem...
how do you describe this crushing feeling? it feels like its burning another pain inside as it made my heart beat so fast.
I knew not to be fooled by this pathetic feeling.
I knew not to say too much that it can hurt even a slightest word can make it worse.
This is the last poem i shall write and should this lasts for what seem like an eternity.

I just want to say i'm sorry for falling in love
I'm sorry for being a fool
I'm sorry for this feelings that i can't control nor can i understand.
As the feelings grew the feeling of suffocation comes in and suffocates me until i can't breath any longer.
My feelings are valid and i can't understand why i can feel it.
Even though i can sleep well i still felt restless as if i been thinking while my eyes are shut.

Please...
Everyday communication with you. Hurts...
I don't know how to react to every signals you give.
My mind blank, My chest feels tight and i don't know what you mean.
No one has ever told me something that can make me this anxious and confuse.
No one once make me speechless and can't breath.

Like a fish out of water and a flower without a soil.
My heart has been frozen for too long i forgot the warm feeling that spreads and made me beg for answers.
I don't know if i should be happy,sad,angry,confuse. My emotions became mixed as i kept asking myself if i should react.

For me love is...
love is...
What is love?
i'm lost I know how to say it yet i don't know how to show it.
I feel cold and my chest feels tight and i feel like i need to stop breathing before it hurts even more.

I promised you that i'll help you understand this feeling yet I can't even understand it myself.
I told myself that i don't deserve to love because everyone leaves me wondering...
But...
Seeing you smile makes me forget my name. It warms my heart and butterflies flies everywhere. The light in your eyes is the light that i was looking for.

The way you talk to me even without a sing-song tune still sound like a soft whisper.
Your touch felt like you mean it for me to stay...
What am i to you?
Seeing your eyes spark a light made me see alot of things.
How come you never notice that?

I want to stop this nonsense. It doesn't feel right.
I don't deserve you just as much as i don't deserve to love.
you're too special to be with someone like me.
So i would like to end this last poem
with an mixed up feelings and the feeling of suddenly having to hear you say the words i never in my entire existance have someone say those to me.