This is a review of the first chapter of War Zone by forNarnia19 . Finals are crazy and I have a basketball game in a little bit but I wanted to get your review done quickly. I will read the rest of your book and leave comments, but for now, here is the review for my first impression of the book.
The description was a bit long but it was a good hook to getting readers to read it, so good job!
The characters seemed real, I especially liked the meticulous descriptions of the people. My favorite was probably when you were describing Wyatt's mother in the kitchen. The flour on her clothes and the bags under her eyes really gave the reader a good visual of the scene.
Lucy is probably my favorite character; I can tell she's a little spitfire already :)
The only problem I found, and even this is a stretch, was that a few of the paragraphs could've been combined with others to make the scene flow smoother.
Your grammar was just about spotless an your dialogue was appropriate to the scene. While some authors add unnecessary dialogue and choppy exchanges between characters, your's seemed authentic.
Overall, I would definitely recommend this book!
YOU ARE READING
Sketchbook
Random"You were born an original. Don't die a copy" My artwork improves by the chapter, so the beginning is kind of sketchy. Hard work doesn't work unless you work hard :) Cover painted by: hope_sees_the_stars (me) Cover title done by: KateAnn21
