Destiel Oneshots

It's Always Me

SEASON 9 FINALE!?!? I AM STILL TOO EMOTIONAL TO WORK OKAY :)))))))))))

!!!!!!!!!!!SPOILER WARNING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

CONTAINS SPOILERS FROM THE SEASON 9 FINALE

_ _ _ _ _ 

As Dean woke up he was lying in a bed and Crowley standing next to him. Just before he could open his mouth to ask him what the hell he is doing here, Dean had to blink. And again. And again. Something is...different. He sat up, fast, and looked around before looking down at himself and back to Crowley.

"What..." Dean was too confused to even finish. He felt... powerful, but this power was not comparable to the feeling he got through the mark of cain, no. This was so much more different. Crowley just laughed shortly.

"Well, welcome back, Dean the human boy. Oh no, wait wrong. Dean, Dean, the demon boy. Sounds better anyway, heh? How about deanmon?" After Crowley finished laughing Dean still did not understand. He was dead, Metatron killed him... didn't he?

"God, this joke was pure gold but if you don't want to laugh, fine. Welcome to the dark side Winchester" and suddenly, Crowley was gone. Dean's mind was filled with too many thoughts and before he knew what's going on, he was standing in the bathroom. How... how did he get here? In the corner of his eyes he could see the mirror and he slowly turned to face himself... to face it.

A few days later

Sam was sitting in the bunker as he downed his second bottle of Jack Daniels.

Castiel searched through all of heaven for Deans soul, but frustration took over as he could not find it.

Dean was sitting in a dark forest, surrounded by thick, old trees and his thoughts alone. Also, he had a demon-blade in his hands for the past days, trying to decide if he should do it or not. He is now something supernatural... it got black eyes, kill it... right? 

"Hello smokey eyes" Crowley said immediately as he showed up in the bunker, but he did not speak to Dean, but to a very drunk Sam. Sam turned around slowly and he looked worse than Dean did. More... dead than Dean did. ".. Watcha wan' assh- hole?" he managed to slure out and Crowley raised an eyebrow. "You really don't get along with Dean being a demon now? Wow, I though that at least you-" Sam sobered up fast and jumped out of his chair, still a bit out of balance though. "Dean is... wh... he lives!??" 

"Here you can see a moose, very confused" Crowley mocked and rolled his eyes. Sam grabbed the table to keep balance and his mind seemed to explode. Dean is alive? Where is he? Why does Crowley know and not him? Dean is a demon!?!?!?!? 

"..How?" is all Sam could say. 

"Well..." Crowley began as he started to tell Sam about what exactly was going on. After he finished, Sam was sitting down and staring at the walls. "And....what now? Where is he?" 

_ _ _ _

Sam and Crowley found Dean thanks to Crowleys connections. After a rather long hug between Sam and Dean and an even longer argument, Crowley couldn't stand it anymore and snapped them back to the bunker. A tense silence has fallen between the Winchesters. Crowley left to let them sort out their problems, but before he vanished he snipped his fingers for a last surprise.

_ _ _ _

Crowley snapped his fingers and in the moment he left, Castiel replaced his empty spot. The back of Castiel faced the Winchesters and suddenly, Dean was afraid. He knew he could deal with Sam, but with Cas... that was a whole other thing. Castiel realized that he has changed locations and quickly recognized the bunker and he knew now, Sam was behind him, but also... Dean? He turned around a bit too quickly and as Castiel and Dean looked at each other it seemed like they were suddenly in the middle of a war.

Castiel was surrounded with blue and white air, a huge pair of wings behind him and a grace, in the middle as blue as Castiel's eyes when sunlight shines onto them but the outsides faded into a black and red colour, it was burning out, slowly. The sound of waves and birds surrounded him and animals like zebras and antelopes were running somewhere far behind him. The feeling Dean got as he looked at him was overwhelming.

Castiel saw a whole other image though. Dean was surrounded by darkness. Black and blood-red winds flew around him and strong horns grew out of his head. The place where his soul should be was replaced with a dark ball which seemed to be pumping like a heart. Agony rushed through his veins now and his mind was aching for oblivion. Heavy steps of wild animals made the pumping sound of the dark ball inside him appear even stronger and more threatening and his eyes, his once so green and pure eyes, gone. 

Sam only saw his brother and the angel having an intense eye staring contest once again. Little that he knew was that the both of them just saw the true forms of each other for the first time. Sam sat down and waited. His mind was empty, his whole world just broke. His brother was alive and really, he couldn't be happier about that, but the whole demon thing. He slapped himself as the thought of killing Dean crossed his mind because this wasn't an option. Cure him maybe... he would find a solution.

Dean was sure, he just witnessed the most beautiful thing this universe could have created. Also he was sure that Castiel saw the exact opposite and suddenly he felt incredibly insecure. Just as he wanted to turn around to hide his face, his eyes, Castiel walked towards him and ... hugged him to Deans surprise. Castiel held him tighter than he ever did and Castiel fought with himself, he couldn't cry now. Dean hugged back, closed his eyes and pretended everything was still alright. 

His green eyes sparkling in the sunlight, Sam and him laughing over a childish joke, their biggest problem a group of vampires. Them and Cas sitting together in the impala discussing something. 

But no. His mother died. His father abused him. He left them. Dean kept Sam from a normal life. His father died too and so many other people... Bobby, Jo, Ellen..Kevin. Dean was in hell. He had to live without Sam for a time, he had to live without Cas for a time, hell he even was in purgatory. And now, was he even still Dean? All the bad things that could happen, all of them happened to Dean.

"...it's always me, isn't it?" Dean tried to say jokingly, but instead choked it out through his sore throat. He wanted to cry, to scream, to feel, but he couldn't, and probably never again.

"No Dean it's not. You still got us." Sam answered from somewhere in the back and Castiel remained silent. They were still hugging each other. 

Suddenly Cas' hands traveled up and down Dean's spine, messed a bit with his hair, before Castiel sighed and whispered "Remember when you said we could fix this and I said it is not broken?" 

Dean nodded.

"Well, now it is broken. Everything is broken. You are and I am too. Both of us are so broken... but you know, we can still fix this." 

_ _ _ _ _

A/N: So this was more of a little beginning of a story, I just felt like writing something to the finale, because I just... I just had to okay. What do you think, do you guys want me to continue this story or really only write oneshots? Please comment! Hope you liked this one xx

~ AliceeLaa