After weeks apon weeks of experiments, Ben Paddlewad got to know the stupid scientists. Then, one day, they were about to perform another experiment, but suddenly, Ben saw an Internet connection!
"YO HOMIES SMELL YA LATER" The machine hollered for Ben. The Scientists looked at the bacta tank. At Ben's lifeless body. The life moniter flatlined. Ben wasn't dead, his spirit just left his body.
"Oh shit," I thought, "DA BOSS is gonna kill us..." scientists 1 and 2 looked at me with fearfull fear, and nopefull nope.
The next thing Ben Paddlewad knew,he could see nothing but the blue screen of death. Then he realized something. He was falling. He fell and fell and fell until he landed on the screen with a loud SPLASH!
It was actually just water with a bunch of white paint pilled together to form the letters.
Ben enjoyed the calming water. He swam through it. It relaxed him.
Until his limbs dissapeared. He fell through the water. Underwater, everything was dark. Ben started to sink. He tried to hold his breath, but everyone runs out eventually. He started to panic. He tried to swim up, to no avail. Eventually, his throat began to hurt. His throat hurt more and more. As the pain in his throat became more and more intense, his consiousness slowly drifted away...
"In other news, the fusion Diamond, a giant crystal made of all the types of crystals, will be shown off at the 3SPOOPY5ME museum. Mrs. Slick-man-Groove, and her husband, Bootman Bill- *sigh* fuck these names- will be entending the event-that-features-a-thing-that-could-be-easily-sold-on-DA-black-market, where-millions-of-celeberties-will-be-attending-that-could-be-held-hostge-and-held-for-randsom." The reporter chirped.
Jeff the killer stared at the TV screen intently as the news played. His goons watched the TV along with him. "Ya know, she looks very familiar, but I can't quite place my finger on it..." Eyeless Jackass pondered while thinking about all the pale, black haired, black eyed teenage girls that wear black masacara, and black lipstick that he knew. That list was not that long, which is surprising considering he's a creepypasta character.
"So, boss what d'ya think?" One goon asked. "Should we 'drop in unexpectedly'?"
"YOU FOOL!" Jeff bellowed. "THAT WOULD BE INCREDIBLY STOOPID!!!! Instead, we should, drop in unexpectedly, an STEAL DA FUSION CRYS-TAL UAAHHAHAHHHAHAHAHAHAHA hehe." Jeff monalogly monaloged.
"But das what I just said, Fusbucket..." the goon muttered.
Jeff slowly walked up to his goon. Face to dismembered face. Jeff stared at the Muscleman with the kind of scorn that was thought to only be possible in hell. Then, suddenly, Jeff pulled out his "authentic cowboy revolver" and shot the goon 27 times in the chest. Then, when he ran out of bullets, he pulled his pants off and t-bagged the poor thug. He then said to the other goons "IF YOU BOZOS SNAP AT ME LIKE THAT, YOU'LL MEAT DA SEM FATE!!!!" Jeff shrieked. The two remaining gooooons nodded.
YOU ARE READING
Trollpasta:Jeff's Boner
Humorwhat? you want to know what this piece of poorly written shit is about? Then read it, for Christ's sake!
