Meanwhile (as the narrator and point of view changes lazily)
Well this is the story all about how my life got flipped right upside down
And I'd like to take a minute, just sit right there, and I'll tell you all about how I became 3rd greatest creepypasta.
In Forest Hills, Queens I was born and raised.
Playin' video games is how I spent most of my days
Chillin' out maxin' out on cool whip
Fishin outside school
When a faceless baldy who was up to no good, started shaking my little boat
I got into one little fight, and then I drowned
When I woke up,I was in a bacta tank
Being fed morphine by medical tube
I realized I was at the mercy of a trio of idiotic scientists who wouldn't stop singin' the "dexter's laboratory" theme song
"IN DEXTER'S LAB-RA-TOR-YYYYYYY" The vow-less doctors sang. "WHO LIVES THE SMARTEST BOIIII YOU'VE EVER SEEEEEEN, BUT DEDEE BLOWS HIS DICK, TO SMITHEREENS! Oh wait, he's awake..." one of them realized stalkingly, yet thankfully.
"Where am i?" Ben tried to ask, but nothing cum out his throat. Instead, he heard his own words being spoke by a metallic voice cumming outside DA MACHINE.
An awkward scilence lasted for what seemed like forever.
Suddenly, one scientist spoke up. "We found you in a lake outside of our facilities. You had been drowned by some unknowable force of forces."
"GET ME OUT OF HERE" the metallic voice spoke for BEN. "I'm not sure we can do dat..." another scientist stated. "WHY NOT" the metallic voice demanded to asked interrogitivly.
"Unsynching you from DA BACTA TANK would kill ya." The third scientist said.
...Now it was a crowd...
"Can you give us a description of who or what attacked you?" The second scientist asked.
"IT LOOKED LIKE A TALL MAN WEARING A BLOOD AND CUM STAINED TUXEDO, WHOM OF WHICH HAD NO FACE, I'M SURE YOU'VE HEARD THIS ONE A MILLION TIMES" Ben expected the scientists to be absoutlutly bored of that routine by now. But they weren't. No, they had fearfull fear in their goggle covered eyes. "What?" One of dem ask. "Check IT'S cell." One told the thrid. The third scientist ran.
He ran and ran.
He ran and ran
And ran,and ran.
And it'll effect the ram disk.
He eventually cum bak. He said with fearfull fear "IT. THE FACELESS DILDO. IT'S GONE!!!" He shrieked. After shrieking the shreikest shriek that anyone ever shrieked, he fell over and passed out. The second scientist cume over to the the third time scients. 2 felt his pale, veiny neck. He was kill. "He's ded!" 2 sobbed.
Ben wasn't entirely sure what else to say except "YOU HAD ONE JOB"
YOU ARE READING
Trollpasta:Jeff's Boner
Comédiewhat? you want to know what this piece of poorly written shit is about? Then read it, for Christ's sake!
