..But Not Because We're Gay - A Tree Bros Fanfic (Dear Evan Hansen)

Chapter XI

No Requiem

ZOE'S POV

Why should I play the..lovesick girl and lie saying that you hurt me and that my world has gone dark without your light? I will think no requiem tonight.

I felt tears welling up in my eyes, slowly crawling up and out of my eyes. I blinked them back. Why was I crying? This was just some schoolgirl crush thing, right?

Ugh.

I wanted to spill to someone but I had no one to do that to. Most of my friends were either scared of my brother, have other, better friends, or they are avoiding me for some reason. Whatever. I'm being slowly abandoned by most of my friends. Girls are the worst.

I hate this feeling. This feeling is new. Evan was the first guy I've actually liked in a long time. It isn't as serious as I'm making it seem, but ugh. Guys are the worst.

I wanted to get revenge. But to a lesser extent. Revenge makes you think of pain or anger or something. I just want him to know I'm upset about literally nothing.

Do I really want to hurt him? No.. Do I really want to make him cry? No..

Girl problems. Life problems. Not-even-an-actual-problem problems.

EVAN'S POV

I saw Zoe's face as I ran out and she looked disappointed, sad, confused, and cold. She could use a paper fresh out of the printer...

I felt bad. I mean I kind of knew that she liked me, but I didn't want to hurt her feelings by telling her I didn't feel the same.

I didn't hurt anyone, right? (bitch u thought ;))

~

The next day at school, I was nervous to talk to Zoe. Dang. My hands were sweating. This time they were actually sweating. I decided to not talk to her. I took note of her solemn expression, yet how her eyes told me she had been sad.

Connor walked up and talked to me. I was nervous because wow hi it's Connor <3

Also because Zoe probably put two and two together to realise why I screamed I'M BI in her face. God, I suck. I feel weird.

"Hey Ev," Connor said, no real sign of knowing about my bi-ness, which might as well be gayness?? Or knowing about Zoe or my cruuush on Connor or, really, unconditional and undying love and affection for hi-

"Oh hi." I looked up at the significantly taller boy. He smiled.

"Where'd you go yesterday? I heard you screaming 'bye!' but then you just disappeared."

"Um yeah. I- My mom needed me home quickly, so..."

"Heh. Okay," he chuckled. Aw his cheeks got pink. And ooh dimples. And my god he flipped his hair.

The bell rang and we were off to the same study hall. It was also the detention room..

I talked to Connor on my way out and also as I walked to the bus. We're friends??

~

When I got home, my mom called for me immediately. "Evan, honey! Could you come here please?"

"Coming," I shouted back. Hm.

As I approached her in the living room, she looked at my with several different expressions in her face: happiness, wonder, and almost apologetic, in a way.

"Sit down, honey." I did. "So your friend, Chloe? Was her name Chloe?"

"No. Zoe. She- Her name's Zoe."

"Ah. Um. Well Zoe came by today with your sweatshirt," she held up the dark grey piece of fabric. "And she randomly, out of the blue, told me to tell you 'Have fun with your boyfriend,' but she didn't look- she looked serious."

Dang. Wait. Zoe decided to tell my mom? "Oh..?"

"Is it a, like, an inside joke? Just wondering. She also told me you were bi randomly. I don't know if.." she trailed off, hoping I would answer. Gosh, this was awkward as hecc.

"Um." Ooh the hem of my shirt. A distraction. I fiddled around with that for a moment before realising..I've never liked a girl. I've only liked two people and they were both guys: Connor Murphy, and before him it was some kid I knew back in sixth grade, Michael Mell. He was just adorable.

"Sorta."

"What does that mean, Evan, honey?"

"IdontknowIthinkIlikeboysandonlyboys. WownobeinggayisbadIneedtoturnitoff."

My mom took my hand, squeezed it tightly, and said, "Okay. I'm glad you..sort of told me. I'm not mad, mkay?"

I nodded.

I think this oddly short and abrupt revenge put here by the awkward author kind of strengthened my nonexistent bond with my mom. I really think so.

~~~

Wooo that last part was a rushed piece of SHIT.

759 words.

Hi y'all. Has it been for forever since I've added chapters? It feels like it again. Heh.

About Evan's realisation..I'm not sure if that's okay or poorly written or nicely interpreted?? I went through a similar (but sorta not) thing but backwards. Words fail-

I have an update book for y'all. It's where I will put life or story updates, like when I have a new book idea or if I haven't updated in a while. All that good shit.

Feel free to check it out. I have a new book idea I'll put there soon. I want your feedback. :)

Thank you so much for reading about Zoe's failed revenge and Evan's come-to-Moses moment (comment if you get the reference heehee).

Love y'alllll

P.S. Please please pleeaaase tell me if this gets boring or if you have ideas because I just forgot a really good one and like uUgh-

Anyway, thank you for beng here, reading my eEhh book.

-Kayla