your eyes. ;; changlix

.maybe

changbin and felix were lying in felix bed again, the younger's head resting on changbin's chest. they weren't saying anything, both were busy thinking their own thoughts. changbin was so scared. he was scared of felix getting eliminated, he was scared of felix falling behind. because he knew, someone would get eliminated sooner or later. jyp wasn't a bad person and changbin knew that, he'd always treat them well and give them breaks when they needed them and all around, changbin was really happy in jyp. but no matter how good jyp was to them, changbin could only think about how cruel it was for him, to rip them apart in the first place. the elimination of minho put them down for a few weeks, they couldn't talk to minho at all, since they didn't know when he was where.

"jyp isn't stupid, guys. he doesn't do anything without a reason and you know that. he's a good man, so don't hate him for this." was, what minho told them after he got kicked out. changbin really thought about his words for a long time until he realized, that minho was right. jyp wasn't stupid, he debuted some of the best groups and artists out there. but changbin also thought that minho was way too good to be just kicked out like that.

after a while, changbin became worried about someone else getting eliminated. at first he didn't even think about it being felix or himself, he mostly thought about it being chan. not because he thought chan was lacking, but because he knew it would hurt chan the most if he'd get eliminated. chan wanted this debut more than anyone. chan was always the type to say stuff like "if i don't make it this time, i won't make it." "if i fail to debut this time, i'll just quit." and changbin was worried. he didn't want him to quit.

and then, changbin finally realized that felix could get eliminated too. he realized, that everyone at this point, could get kicked out and it made his heart hurt just by the thought of it. him being kicked out was acceptable - at least for changbin. but felix getting eliminated?

"hyung...what if i get kicked out?" felix broke the silence and looked up at changbin. "don't. don't talk about it. don't even think about it." changbin said, letting him no time to complain. felix nodded, but his eyes became sad after that and changbin's heart started beating faster. "what is it, lix?" he asked worried. felix eyes looked down at changbin's chest. "i'm pretty sure i'll get eliminated, hyung." the younger one said, voice quiet. changbin sat up, felix doing the same thing. "stop, felix. stop, okay? listen, i thought about it too. and honestly, at this point, all of us have a chance of being the one, okay? let's just all work harder and let's make sure that we don't lose another one of us, alright? i'll make sure that no one has to go...okay, lix lix?" changbin said. felix nodded and his eyes lighted up a bit.

"i'm gonna go shower." felix said and hopped up, taking a hoodie out of changbin's closet. "could you tell me, why you only wear my hoodies? it's not like you don't have enough of them..." changbin said, smiling as felix turned around, innocent smile on his face, eyes shining. "because yours are more comfy and they smell better." felix answered, before closing the bathroom door, leaving changbin alone.

the older boy smiled at his words, but then remembered what he just told felix. did he really just tell him that he'd make sure no one would have to go? changbin never thought twice before saying stuff to cheer felix up, because normally changbin didn't care. he could do anything as long as it made felix happier. but making sure no one gets eliminated?

changbin already knew it'd be a promise that he wouldn't be able to keep. but he didn't take his words back, whatsoever.

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— me @*** thanks for the anxiety attack :)

i can't wait for 2017 to be finally over like omfg, this year was shit

CHANGBIN IS SO SMOLL HES 167 HQIWH AWWWW MY BABY