The Lifeguard

Chapter 41

Connor's Perspective - until the end

"Hold on, Zoe," I cried as we rush her inside the hospital. Her blood left a trace on a hallway of the hospital.

The nurses and I continued pushing her on a gurney. A doctor came to help as he began asking questions. One of the male nurses pushing the gurney repeated what I told him when we arrived at the hospital.

"Don't let go. Please," I continue to cry as I hold on to her hand.

"Sir, this is the farthest you can go. You must wait here," said the male nurse. "We'll do everything we can to help her."

I tried to force them to let me go in and be with her, but they strained me from doing so. The nurse left, and I fell to the ground. I couldn't feel anything but guilt and sadness.

My world is crashing down, I thought. This is all my fault. I did this to her. I should have pushed her away harder. I should have pushed her to leave me alone. I should have not allowed her to run away with me. Maybe if I did, this wouldn't happen to her. This is my fault, I said to myself. Oh god. Oh god. Oh god. Am I cursed? Why am I losing everyone I love? I cannot lose her. She can't die. She has to live. It was suppose to be me. That bullet was meant for me. Zoe didn't deserve this.

***

"Are you alright? What happened?" asked Anna as she pulled me to her arm. Anna, who was still holding me to her arms, guided me to the nearest chair. We sat down. "Oh Connor."

Tears began falling as I felt their comfort. "I did this to her," I cried again.

Mikael bent down in front of me. "None of this is your fault. She will be okay," he tried to assure me.

"It's not your fault," repeated Anna. She reached for my face as she began wiping my tears. "You need to stay strong for her, alright?"

"Did you try to contact Mrs. Anderson? She needs to know about this. Have you told anyone other than us?" Mikael asked.

I shook my head. "No... Not yet. I don't know what to tell her. I should have protected her daughter, but I failed." Tears continued to fall again. "I failed to protect her."

"I'm sure you did everthing," says Anna.

"Don't worry about it. I will talk to her." Mikael gave me a pat on the shoulder before he leaves. After taking few steps away from us, Mikael came back. He bents down again. "It's not your fault," he reminds me.

When Mikael left, Anna held both of my arms. "She's a strong lady. She will get through this." She continued to comfort me and tries to make me feel better. But no matter what she says, I know deep inside me, I could have done better to protect her, and to prevent this from happening to her.

Mikael came back. "What did you tell the police? I should call our lawyer. I'm pretty sure it was her father. He did this." Mikael had turned mad.

"Mikael. Not now," says Anna in a calm voice.

"He must be put behind bars, Anna!"

"I told them everything," I cut him off. "How it happened, and how we got to the hospital." I sighed. I can still remember every details of what happened. It's still fresh in my head. "Zoe and I were fine. I was in the kitchen when these men came. I'm sure they were Mr. Anderson's men. Who else could it be? They were the only one after us," I began explaining. "One of them pointed the gun at me before I could even fight back. When Zoe came in the kitchen, I was furious at myself because I couldn't do anything. The other man grabbed her hand. I saw how terrified she was but I didn't do anything. I couldn't do anything. She yelled for my name as she got taken away. The only thing I was able to do was assure her that it will be okay. I assured her that, but I failed."

Mikael sat down beside us as he began comforting me. Anna who is still holding my hands, put her head on my shoulder.

"When she was gone, the man pointing the gun at me began grabbing me. I was able to fight back. I fought hard just to get to Zoe. I succeed in that. But when I came out, she was already in the car. So I fought the other man until I was able to hold her again." I paused.

"It's okay," reminded Anna.

"I was already holding her. I got her," I said under my breath. "It happened so fast. I wasn't able to prevent it. She saved me from the bullet. It was suppose to be me!"

"Oh Connor," sighed Anna. I can feel the sadness in her voice.

"Few men who were passing by, and saw what happened. They ran to help. Before they got to us, both of the men got away. No one usually passes by our area, but during that horrible time, these men came to rescue us."

Now, Mikael and Anna are both hugging me.

"But Zoe saved my life. It was suppose to be me, but she took the bullet for me. She saved me," I repeated.