Forever Losers

Chapter 12: Something Worth Living

It has officially been one week since we have been in hiding. And as much as it may sound crazy, I felt like we couldn't get any closer than this. It was the first time in so long, since I felt free. The first time in years since I felt so happy, wild and amused. Since we went hiding out for a week, we got closer. More stories to share, more days to pass, more hours to enjoy. Every night we had a bonfire outside, Fillip brought his guitar and we would all sing to each other, and get drunk, and no one would tell us how to run our lives.

When we we're alone here in the middle of nowhere, we enjoy it. No one can hurt us. No one can make us suffer. No one makes us feel pain. We all felt loved. And what made me feel like staying here, is that we we're happy. Free. Proud. Unashamed. Accepted. Goofy. And worth living.

"Hey guys guess what day it is?" Jeralyn calls out to us, as we we're all swimming in the lake. We turn to her as she smiles grimly. I stayed a little away from the deep end, for I could not comfortably swim. Luckily Fillip was close by me so I didn't feel so alone, while the others swam further into the lake.

"Hey Fillip, Valerie!" Jeralyn calls out to us. "Come closer, so I won't have to shout so loud!" I swallow a lump in my throat. Jeralyn knew that I couldn't swim. Actually what surprised me about her, was that she a small little girl, but she was able to swim far.

As soon as Fillip hears her, he swims towards her. He faces me before her swims off and says, "Come on Val, they're not too far." He smiles. I shake my head fiercely. He offers me his hand, but I back away more. Fillip shrugs and swims away to them. Shaking his head to the group. Now, that's when alone.

I see them all look at me. Eagerly waiting for me to swim over. I keep quiet and just look to them. I see Jeralyn whisper something into Scotch's ear. I see from afar Scotch rolling his eyes, as he starts foreword. Swimming over to me. I feel embarrassed. Ashamed that I couldn't swim. Automatically, I start to feel my cheeks burn up warmer, the closer he came. I wanted to get away. So I decided to swim back to shore. Not wanting to complicate things.

"Valerie wait!" He calls out. I stop abruptly, and turn to him. Waiting for him to come closer. He stops in front of me, and I see his face clearly. Wet, and water dripping down from his face. A little piece of hair covering his eyes. "Get on my back so I'l just carry you over there." He says to me.

"Why can't you guys just come over here." I whined.

He rolls his eyes, and starts foreword placing his big hands on my hips. I squeal a little as he carries me roughly, placing my small body onto his back. My breathing started to increase heavily as I held tightly onto his neck. The way he held me made my head whirl faster, wanting to escape from his wrath. But then, my heart punched me harder, telling me to keep still. I plant my head into the crook of his neck, closing my eyes as he swam over to them. "Do anything to my back, kick me, hit it or kiss it, I swear Valerie, I'll do the same to you tonight." His deep voice whispers and flirts into my ear, sending shivers down my spine.

"Finally took long enough." Jeralyn exclaimed to us, as we got there. "That was my idea by the way. I knew you would resist swimming over here." I face her slowly and she winks to me.

She smiles grimly at Justin, who looks to her concerned. She crosses her arms together and smirks to all of us. I kept clinging into Scotch, because I was scared of drowning. She continues to smile at Justin, while we all look to her confused. Suddenly, Justin's face starts to soften, and then turns cold, then horrified..

"Today is May 1st! Exactly five years ago from today, Justin was thirteen years old when he admitted that he was gay!" She yells out to us quickly and excitedly, before Justin could jump on her to shut her up. I look to the both of them with wide eyes. If this was the only reason why she wanted me here in the middle of the lake, then I was a little disappointed.