Flower Boy (BoyxBoy)

recording #1

Recording #1, Friday, November 13, Eddward
Status: Opened

"Please state your name and diagnosis."

"My name is Eddward, and I have been diagnosed with anxiety and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder."

"Very good," the woman says kindly. "Don't be nervous."

Edd laughs. "Who's nervous?"

The woman chuckles. "So, how was your week?"

"Very good. I woke up early and cleaned my room--It's a mess since our professors are trying to prepare us for midterm exams before the winter break."

"Are you stressed?"

"Not particularly," Edd says. "But for some reason, there is a voice in my head which insists that I'm going to fail, so I keep studying."

"Well, it's better to know it like the back of your hand instead of not at all, right?" The therapist says. "Just don't push yourself too hard, okay? Take breaks to sleep and eat and talk to people."

"Yes, okay."

"How was breakfast this morning?"

"It was, um, it was okay. Bland."

"Okay, Edd, just remember to eat tomorrow okay? You've been doing so well!"

Edd sighs. "How could you tell I was lying? I'm a very good liar."

"You can't lie to a therapist," she says, laughing.

Edd chuckles.

"So, Edd, I would like to take the opportunity we were given with the recording and talk about your past."

The low rustling of jeans on leather is heard in the background as Edd moves uncomfortably. "Okay. What would you like to know?"

"Let's start where we left off: high school."

He sighs--stopping himself half way.

"Tell me about the things you did in school," The therapist says. "How do you think other people saw you?"

"I was the 'nerd', I suppose," he states simply.

"How would you describe your high school experience?"

Edd pauses and thinks. "Confusing and agonizing."

"Why do you say that?"

"I was trying to figure out who I was while also maintaining a four-point-oh GPA. Stress by my surgeon parents and peers definitely didn't help. It was hard, and I never really had anyone I could lean on but my two friends," Edd sighs. "I'm grateful to be out of high school."

"How did your parents stress you out?"

"Them being around me is stressful since the divorce."

The therapist hums. "And your peers?"

"Um, I don't want to say bullying, but I suppose that I was a little harassed," Edd says.

"Can you explain what happened?"

"Just, um, you know... A few boys would just call me rude names or, um, knock books out of my hand."

"How often did that happen?"

"Very, very often. I believe that this is when I first started noticing my anxiety--probably due to the stress of having to go to school and seeing people who didn't like me for some reason. I still don't know why--I guess because I was skinny and studied a lot."

"I see. Did it ever stop?"

Edd laughs sharply. "Towards the middle of my junior year is when I'd say it was at its lowest. People needed me to help them study, and since I was in National, Spanish, and French Honor Society, a lot of people came to me. After I helped them, it almost completely stopped."

"You weren't medicated back then, right?" A pause. "How did you cope? Remember that you don't have to answer everything if you don't want to."

"No, no, it's fine. I used to hurt myself to forget about the people at school," Edd sighs and I can tell that he's rubbing his face. "I don't know why I kept doing it even though it never worked."

"Everyone makes mistakes Edd, and sometimes our minds become accustomed to certain things and we crave it. We go crazy for it. But you are improving so much! You're doing so well at eating every day, taking your medication, and drawing on your arms instead of hurting yourself."

"Thank you, Ms. Salid," Edd says, laughing shyly.

"Before you leave, Edd, tell me what you liked about high school. What are your favorite memories of high school?"

"I liked my friends. Eddy and Ed were always there for me and they really helped me get through a lot. And I enjoyed the Honor Societies. Earning valedictorian is still the highlight of my life so far."

"Awesome, Edd," The therapist, Ms. Salid, says. "You definitely earned it."

"Thank you."

"Alright, see you next week, yeah?" Ms. Salid says. "Good work this week, you're doing great!"

Edd laughs and a door opens. "Have a good week, Ms. Salid!"

"Thank you!"

The door closes and there's silence for a few seconds until footsteps can be heard walking across the room.

"Such a great kid. I really hope he's okay. Oh--Is this thing still going? Um, well, I guess for the future therapist listening; just remember to end on a high note. Even if it's something small like telling your patient they're doing great or asking for the highlight of their week--always end on a good note. Okay, uh, bye then!"