Dedicated to
@Chloe333221
@MissHollywoodUndead
@Butterfly_Fairy
♧♣♧♣♧♣♧♣
When I'm using a calculator I press the clear button five times just to be sure.
♧♣♧♣♧♣♧♣
Dear extra fat in my body, make your way up to my boobs or GTFO.
♧♣♧♣♧♣♧♣
My parents: You're beautiful.
Old people: I bet boys are chasing after you already.
Boys my age: Ew, what is that creature?
♧♣♧♣♧♣♧♣
I wonder if girls on '16 and pregnant' will come back as '32 and a Grandma.'
♧♣♧♣♧♣♧♣
If you were a dinosaur you'd be a 'bitch-a-whoreus'.
♧♣♧♣♧♣♧♣
Girls are like magic.
They can get wet without water.
Bleed without injury.
And make boneless things hard!
♧♣♧♣♧♣♧♣
The best way to avoid parking tickets is to remove your windshields wipers.
♧♣♧♣♧♣♧♣
The reason Grandparents and Grandchildren get along so well is because they have a common 'enemy'.
♧♣♧♣♧♣♧♣
Don't make me mad and then tell me to calm down. That's like shooting someone and wonder why they're bleeding.
♧♣♧♣♧♣♧♣
You know you're truly grown up once the waiter stops bringing you crayons and paper at a restaurant.
♧♣♧♣♧♣♧♣
Cleaning my room:
10% Cleaning
30% Complaining
60% Playing with cool stuff I've just found!
♧♣♧♣♧♣♧♣
I wasn't aware that answering my mom's question was considered talking back.
♧♣♧♣♧♣♧♣
When you look up a song's lyrics and realise you've been singing it wrong the whole time.
♧♣♧♣♧♣♧♣
Everything is funnier when you're not allowed to laugh.
♧♣♧♣♧♣♧♣
Who needs April Fools when your whole life is a joke.
♧♣♧♣♧♣♧♣
People who are in shape, eat junk food and don't exercise are the reason I hate people.
♧♣♧♣♧♣♧♣
I am not sure if I'm hungry but I'll eat anyways. Just in case.
♧♣♧♣♧♣♧♣
When you repeat a word so much it doesn't sound like a word anymore.
♧♣♧♣♧♣♧♣
That awesome feeling of how gangster you are after rapping your favourite part of a song without screwing up.
♧♣♧♣♧♣♧♣
Most common lies.
-I won't laugh, I promise.
-Your table will be ready in a few minutes.
-Sorry, my parents said no.
-No, I'm okay. Just tired.
-I'm just kidding.
-I never got your text.
-Okay, just one more episode.
-I'm fine.
-I'm on my way.
-You will need to know this later in life.
-I have read and agreed to the term and conditions.
♧♣♧♣♧♣♧♣
We all have that friend that...
1) Doesn't gets pimples.
2) Has the dirtiest mind.
3) Looks Chinese but isn't.
4) You secretly can't stand.
♧♣♧♣♧♣♧♣
I seriously thought I'd already posted this!!
Soooo anyways... Here you go!
