Brahms x Reader - After the killing

Chapter 9 - Big Brahms or little Brahms

No wonder, since he's been all alone with only the company of his parents all these years.
"My parents won't be back." He says at last.
His voice slightly cracking at the last word. You think about the letter you found by accident. You don't want him to think you were snooping, so you decide to act as if you had no idea.
"I'm... I'm so sorry to hear that." You begin. "Do you know why...?"
Brahms thinks for a moment and then nods, his head hanging.
"Because of me." He says and you notice yourself holding your breath, waiting with nervous anticipation for Brahms to finally tell you about himself. You feel as if this moment is so fragile and so rare that even the smallest thing could break it and ruin what just could be about to begin.
"I told you, I was bad. I didn't follow my rules." He adds after some time. You think carefully about your answer. The picture of little Emilie Cribbs sneaks into your mind, but you don't think this is the moment to talk about her or whatever awful tragedy happened back on Brahms 8:th birthday.
"They cared for you very much, Brahms." You tell him. You remember the way Mrs. Heelshire held Brahms the doll in her arms, looking into its glass eyes with a mothers selfless love. And the way Mr. Heelshire told you about their son, how he was 'very much with them still'. And of course, the letter in Brahms room; "Words cannot describe our heartbreak as we leave you now. We will not be back. We simply cannot bear to live with what we have allowed you to become."  What they had allowed him to become... What was that exactly?
"They told me you like music, poetry, books... that you're shy, and playful. Whatever you did..." You continue. "... maybe they left because they felt it was their fault."
'What we have allowed you to become' echoes through your mind.
Brahms seems to be listening to every word you say, still looking down at his hands.
"It just happens. I get... angry." He says after some time. "I can't be good."
You nod and remember what he desperately told you back in the passages when you were close to escaping.
"You made me breakfast in bed, and apologized for scaring me. That was good." You tell him.
"Did it make you happy?" Brahms asks and you can't help but smile a little.
"Yes, it did." You answer and he looks at you quickly before he glances down again.
"That makes me happy too, then." He mumbles. It warms your heart to hear. He isn't just a strange man in a mask, there really is something innocent about him, also. How is that even possible?
In all his cold blooded killing and creepy dressing of life size dolls there shouldn't be room for innocence. But somehow you sense it anyway.
Maybe it's the way he acts like a child when he really is an adult. Or the way he knows he did something wrong and tries to make up for it the best he can. Or the way he is so inexperienced with other people.
"I was getting rather used to little Brahms, but it's nice to talk to you like this." You say.
"Do you think so?" he asks with surprise in his shy voice and you nod.
"Do you... like big Brahms or little Brahms better?" he then wonders.