The Boy Who Used To Be My Best Friend

Cold reality

Moon/Xavier P.O.V

shock. I was in pure shock.

She got a tattoo of me? Well not me, my nickname she gave me when we were kids. The moon was beautiful against her creamy skin in the middle of her back. It was greyish blue with perfect craters indented in the inside.

  I walked closer to get a better look. Inside of the moon was a little heart. If you looked hard enough it had a small  crack running down the middle. Gulping I ran my hand over the tattoo carefully.

I didn't ignore the weird but satisfying sensation I felt when I touched her warm skin. She jumped unaware I was this close.

"Why would you get this?" I whisper.

She quickly put on her tank top and turned to me. Her cheeks were red. "Every birthday  brought back bittersweet  memories of you giving me that necklace, when I turned 17 Lucky gave me another necklace".

"Wait a minute you're dating a guy named Lucky?" I asked stiffling a laugh.

"Shutup. Like I was saying he gave me a  new necklace  and he wanted me to take off the one that you got for me" she fiddled with her necklace while sadness clouded her eyes. My heart strings pulled painfully at the sight of her expression.

I always hated seeing her sad.

"So I realized that maybe one day I might lose the necklace by accident or by some thief stealing it" she paused and then swallowed. "I thought getting a tattoo of you would be the perfect reminder.  Something that's always there" her voice grew softer as she concluded her reasoning.

I could see the embarrassment and shame in her eyes. I immediately started to get angry. " I didn't ask you to do that. You can't blame me for that tattoo."

She groaned loudly massaging her scalp like she was in stress. "Don't you think I know that. I'm officially the worst girlfriend in the world." She flopped on her bed and screamed into her pillow.

I'm sure she screamed for about 10 whole minutes before she sat up straight in her bed. I slowly sat in front of her and watched as she began to silently argue with herself under her breath. Something she'd always do.

She began to facepalm herself over and over again until I grabbed her hand and laced her fingers with mine. My whole body felt more alive just by a simple touch from her. My heart started to thump loudly. I forgot how soft her hand was it reminded me of silk.

"What are you doing?" She asked her golden eyes wide open pupils dilated. I smirked  "stopping you from giving yourself brain damage" she let out a giggle that made my heart flutter with happiness.

Dude snap out of it.

I quickly let go of her hand and stood up. Putting as much distance between us as I possibly could. I couldn't tell if disappointment or relief passed through her eyes becasue it was good as soon as it came. 

"That tattoo was a stupid childish mistake" I left no room for emotion in my voice. I saw her swallow and nod her head. I'm gonna get it removed one day. The day I'll have the courage to tell my mom I even got it"

A coldness swept over me at the fact she's getting it removed. But, I should be glad it will be gone. Right?

Stupidly I went back over to her bed and sat down. Her eyes squinted in curiosity at my indecipherable movements around her room. I ignored her gaze and took out my phone and quickly snapped a picture of her.

"What the hell. Moon! I wasn't ready delete that" she whined. I grinned. "Nope off guards are the best" she grimaced "not in my case".

"Whatever" I said putting my phone back up.

"My mom wanted me to invite you to the  New years party we're gonna be throwing. "

"I'll come if I can bring my girlfriend" I almost cringed at my own words. She only nodded "cool".

"Could you try to get along with her?" I asked her softly. She looked at me with those beautiful eyes and for a moment I forgot I even had a girlfriend.

"Yea but, she has to try as well" she gave me a pointed look.

"I'll make sure she does" I tell her and she gives me a small smile.

"We should try too" I say.

"Try what?"

"Try to be best friends again" I smiled her.

Her smile took my breath away. " I would like to try"

"I'm gonna go get you some more snacks " I say standing up.

"Good, you should spend the night and we could watch some movies" she said snuggling under the covers.

I was practically itching to get under the covers and cuddle with her. I remember doing it all the time when we were younger. Those were the best most peaceful moments I've ever had. Moments I craved for when I was in military school.

So I let myself get lost in what I wanted. In what I've missed out on in years. I quickly went to the gas station to get our snacks. I came back to the house to see that her favorite movie 'the breakfast club' was already playing.  I handed her the  snacks and she mumbled a quick thank you before eating them.

I took off my shoes and black t-shirt leaving myself in a white tank top. I grinned as I felt her eyes roaming my body bashfully. After we were done eating all the snacks I got under the cover with her. Something I haven't done in so long.

I instinctively wrapped my arms around her waist and put my head in the crook of her neck as causally as possible. I inhaled her sweet scent greedily because I've missed it so much. She giggles and began to play in my hair the sensation making me in need of a cold shower. So I took her hand out of my hair before I couldn't control myself.

She gave me a curious look and I replied with kissing her knuckles. Smiling she mumbled a quiet goodnight before her breathing slowed and sleep took her away. Like a creep I watched her. I grinned at her violet hair. I studied her freakishly long eyelashes that rested on her upper cheeks, her cute button nose the famous dimple in her chin, and lastly her plump,pink lips. 

I automatically licked my lips at the sight of hers. The more I watched I realized that those lips didn't belong to me. Nor did she. I left her ,and now....now  she has a boyfriend. No matter how much I hate it it's the truth. It's unfair that I'm doing this, first I kissed her and now I'm cuddling with her. We can't just have a friendship because I know it's so much more. No matter how right it feels. This is wrong.

The truth is she doesn't need me. If I continue whatever this is it will end up hurting the both of us. I'm toxic.

So I unwrapped my arms from around her waist, ignoring my protesting heart. I climbed out of the bed and tugged on my shoes and t-shirt. I regretted every stepped I took all the way to my car to make it worse still had her scent on my tank top.

From now on I'll only be a friend. No more, and No less.

I don't know if  what I did was right but, to love means to let go. So I drove off with tears blurring my vision and the  realization hit me that I  left a beautiful dream for a cold reality.

But it was the right thing to do....

I'M SO MAD. THE FIRST TIME I WROTE THIS CHAPTER I WAS SO HAPPY WITH IT BUT WHEN I PUBLISHED IT THE HALF OF THE CHAPTER WAS GONE AND I HAD TO WRITE IT OVER!!!

UGGH
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