Snag Reads Her Old Fanfiction

Chapter 10- The Evil Plot

*oof*

The dark silhouette of a cat sat on the dark mushy ground, it's purple eyes boring into the half-lynx Thornstar.
...? I had to read that a few times lol

"Are the effects coming along?" Soultaker growled, his voice like an old dead tree that was about to fall. "We cannot afford a delay."

Thornstar scratched his right ear with a hind leg, his long thorn- sharp claws looking deadlier than ever. "Yes, Soultaker." He growled, recalling Spiritfeather's fateful fall. "She killed an arrival."
What?? How??

"Eh?" Soultaker questioned. "I haven't yet felt an arrival's soul. Are you getting delusional, old lynx?"
Oh yeah I had a plan for this..

Thornstar growled. "She dropped her from over fifteen fox-lengths high!" He snarled, irritated. "Of course she's killed one!"
Theres this magical thing called "tails" and cats use them to "land on their feet".

Soultaker leapt from his place, spitting and hissing. "Are you doubting me, old cat?"
You shouldn't be calling anyone old, Soultaker.

Thornstar backed off a little. "No, Soultaker, just wondering out loud..."

"Good." Soultaker sat back down, not flinching as he sat on a bramble trendil.
And it went up his butt and into his large intestine where he promptly died about a week later-

"Well, this can't be the reason you called me here, to fight over an arrival." Thornstar grumbled, still offended by Soultaker's harsh words.
You're offended by everything, Fluffy.

Soultaker grinned, his red-stained yellow teeth the only thing not black except for his glowing purple eyes. "Oh, yes. I almost forgot. Embersoar should know the moon doesn't rotate around her."
Did she.. think that before..?

Thornstar tilted his massive head, clueless.

"The prophecy, you beetle-brain!" Soultaker yowled, frustrated. "Embersoar isn't the only cat in the prophecy! There are two others..."
I'm gonna be honest, I kinda forgot that too.

Thornstar rolled his deep green eyes. "Well, duh! There wouldn't be a big, important prophecy with only one cat!"
Firestar, Firestar again, Bramblestar-

"I have already put one in sleep-venom, but one still runs and plays."
You're very creative with your voodoo elixirs

Thronstar growled. "Which one? Get to the point!"

Soultaker gave Thornstar a withering glare, then continued. "The one in Skypride thinks everything is carefree. You must lure her here and capture her. I will give you further instructions later. Oh, and for the bars, use the sharpest bramble you can find."
I read "bars" as "bras" at first???

Thornstar nodded, grinning. He knew exactly what Soultaker wanted him to do.
Ooh

"She will regret ever being born into this world. Just leave it to me."
Don't we all though