Dear Richie,
Every time i look at you i feel a part of me dies. I feel empty without you. We were sitting next to each other during lunch and i think you finally noticed that i wasn't in good condition. You kept looking into my red puffy eyes, trying to talk to me. I would always see your mouth open, about to say something but I would turn around before you did. I couldn't handle being able to talk to. You tried to grab my wrist but I flinched every time I felt your hand. I knew if you saw what was on my wrist, you would regret seeing it.
I know what you were thinking and yes, I did self-harm but it wasn't only about you. My mom has been very abusive lately and I've been affected by it. She would force me to take my meds and if I didn't, she won't cook for me. I would either starve or take medication that could affect me in the future. She's also slapping and punching me if I ever talk back to her. So if you were wondering why I'm wearing long sleeves during sunny days its so I can cover all the bruises and all the self harm.
I miss you. I miss being able to look at you without a tear forming in my eyes. You and Angelika went on your first date for your 1 month anniversary. Beverly wanted to throw a party at her house but i didn't go. I knew everyone would be happy and i didn't want to ruin everything like i always do. At least you guys had fun while i layed on my bedroom floor crying, hoping someone can save me from the pain but no one was there.
I only heard the screaming and pain that was coming out of my mouth. I closed my eyes as i cried myself to sleep. It was a normal thing for me to cry at night, the night is when everything is silent and dark and you're only alone with your thoughts. I would cry so loud that my mother would hear me and come into my room to beat me up.
I needed your help! I needed your shoulder to cry on but you weren't there! I felt so alone and so unstable. I felt like nobody wanted me anymore and my life meant nothing to me or anyone else. You were that one person that was always there for me when I needed help and I really needed help but you weren't there. I don't blame you though I mean I wouldn't hang out with me either. I didn't feel the point in living anymore.
Love,
Eddie ( the numb and empty )
-
-
-
-
-
NOT PART OF THE BOOK
Omg I can't thank you enough for all the reads!! You guys are amazing and i love youu. The next few chapters are going to be pretty dark and sad so if you are triggered by those types of things, don't read them. Just a warning :) - the writer
YOU ARE READING
Dear Richie
Fiksi PenggemarHi, I'm Eddie. I have a major problem, I'm in love with my best friend Richie. I don't know how to tell him so instead I write it in my diary. I have a book full of things I want to tell you but don't have the balls to say it ;-; *Warning* : • su...
