Heaven Below (Adam Lambert fanfic)

Part Three

"You can't be here." I say as I open my window slightly. He started coming in and I had no energy to stop him.

"I heard shouting earlier. Thought something was wrong?" He landed onto my carpeted floor, making a small thud. Tears fell down my cheek fuck.

"Woah, Zoe. What's wrong?" He asked softly. He held me close.

"Kill me." i sobbed into his shoulder. I was not one for public affection, but I didn't want to continue living in this world. This cruel, cruel world.

"I can't." He simply sighs, rubbing my back softly. It reminded me of when my mother would do that to help me sleep. Maybe that explains why I don't sleep well since she died.

"Please...I have nothing to live for. My Dad hates me. Beats me. I get abused at school in every way possible. Please, Joel" I looked up to his eyes, they shone down on me like a guardian. He slowly and softly kissed my lips. Once he pulled away I sighed. I didn't feel anything. Was I supposed to feel something? Anything? I push him away from me and wipe my pathetic tears away.

"You should go" I spoke. "It's getting late"

"I'm not leaving for you to get hurt. You're coming with me." I stared at him as if he had two heads. Is he fucking crazy?

"At least let me get dressed." No, I was the crazy one for even letting those words escape my mouth. I got into my skinny jeans and baggy jumper as it was cold, I put on my converse and went out the window without Joel even realising. It was 3AM, Dad would kill me if he found out i have left, but lucky me, he's probably passed out drunk on the lounge. I jumped down onto the soft but cold wet grass, Joel did the same. We snuck around the side and over the big wooden fence. Joel only lived one street down, handy hey?

"Zoe?" He asked as we were out of sight from my house.

"What?" I stopped and turned around, I didn't know we had walked this far.

"Tell me what really happened, with all the shouting." I stared at him. I couldn't tell him. He would probably blab to Kylie or something and they'll use it against me.

"I can't say" I whispered just loud enough

"Why not, you've trusted me this far, haven't you?"

"Doesn't mean I need to tell you about my life!" I snap. I shake my head in frustration. Why the fuck does he continue to try and pry into my life like this?

"I..I'm sorry.. I know you're trying your hardest OK. You're ready to break. I know why you're hiding your wrist, Let's not pretend you're alone tonight (Mayday parade lyric :) so please, tell me."

"You wouldn't understand.!" I regret saying that because his eyes welled with tears.

"Oh, tell me, how the fuck don't I understand!" He yelled, i flinched at his words. He came closer, pulling up his sleeve to reveal white and fresh red cuts. I stepped back, covering my mouth as I stood there shocked. "Tell me again, that I do not understand!" He yelled. tears filled the rims of his eyes. I continued to walk backwards. I can't handle men getting angry and walking towards me at the same time...

"You...I..I'm sorry" I stuttered. "I should, um, go... I'll see you tomorrow." I sobbed running off, basically sprinting. Joel called my name out, but I didn't stop to look back. I had no idea where to go. I could go home at 6 to get my school stuff and leave before Dad wakes up.

I stopped at a park after running for about 15 minutes. i sat there thinking.
Is this what my life is going to be like for the next two years? Abuse and sexual assault? By my own father? The one who is supposed to protect me and make sure nothing ever bad happens to me. The man I was supposed to look up to and admire. God, I wish I could have what Kylie has, a loving father, a mother that is still around. Me? I am literally nothing. An extra mouth to feed, an extra student to teach, an extra person to be a dick to. I long for what most kids have... Love.