things i can't (l.s)

Chapter 8

Harry's POV:

When I returned home, all I could think about was Louis and how hurt I was that he was friends with Zayn. Now that I knew that, I knew that he was just being nice to me for either a joke, or a bet maybe. I had thought originally that I wouldn't be enough for him in the first place, but this was just another blow at me. I stepped onto my balcony after I had made my way up stairs and lit another cigarette.

"Shit," I muttered softly as I let a tear slip out of my eyes.

A couple minutes later, I finished the last drag and decided the only way to keep me from self-harming again tonight was to get super fucking high. I took out the rest of what I had left over from last weekend and packed the green into a small pipe that I had hidden along with the box of blades and such. I took a long hit and blew the smoke out with a sigh. I put some music on- "Robbers" by The 1975, and lied down on my bed as I let the chemicals dance in my brain and the music flow through my heart.

Thoughts of Louis were drowned out by the melody and finally, sleep overtook me.

~

Monday

Louis' POV:

I need to talk to Harry. I want to know why he acted the way he did. I mean, fuck, I need to know. I just want him to like me. And by the looks of it, he doesn't have many friends. I want to be his friend.

Maybe more than that.

I was walking to class as I was abruptly pulled to the side of the hallway.

"Zayn, what's up?" I asked calmly, although I was rather annoyed from being manhandled.

"Hey, I'll talk to you more about this later but I need to tell you now. Do not ever talk to Harry Styles. He's a fucking freak and if you're caught dead with him or even talking to him, the entire school will either think you're gay, have a mental disease, or will consider you as much of a freak as he is. Take it from me, as your friend. And any ways, I can't be friends with someone who talks to that faggot." He let go of me and walked away without another word.

I didn't know whether to run after him and scream at him and demand he apologise for talking about Harry in that way, or if I should run into the bathroom and try and control my temper... Or if I should go to class. Yeah, I probably should do that. It was fourth period anyway and that means I get to see Harry! I can finally ask him what his problem was the other night.

And I could also look into his forest eyes and get lost in their beauty.

I walk into class and find Harry sitting in the spot he did on Friday. Anxiously, I sit down beside him and turn to see that he hasn't acknowledged my existence at all.

"Harry, would you mind telling me why you ran off on Friday night when I saw you at the convenient store?"

He'd doesn't look at me. All he says is, "Why don't you just leave me alone? Your buddy Zayn already gives me enough shit, I don't need any more."

What? What does he mean by Zayn giving him shit? Zayn said he didn't like Harry and kept calling him a freak but I'm sure he doesn't get too wrapped up in Harry if he really thinks that lowly of him.

"What are you talking about, Harry? I'm not friends with Zayn, I can tell you that now," I expressed. I kept thinking about the way he talked about Harry and I was getting mad just of the thought.

He turned slowly to meet my gaze and there was something so tragically confused in his eyes. He started to speak and the words left his mouth with fire, "Then why did Zayn tell me you were as he was-" he dipped his head down to the desk once again and combed his fringe back with his fingers in frustration.

"When Zayn was what, Harry?" I asked him quizzically. He reached down to grab his stuff and as he got up to run out of class, he muttered a small, "Never mind. Just forget it."

Just as the bell rang for class to begin, Harry was already out of the classroom. The teacher came in a short few seconds later, as he was in the middle of a seemingly hilarious conversation with another English teacher. He must've not seen Harry book it out of class. I heard a loud snort come from the back of the classroom where Zayn sat, just as Harry had left. Turning my head, I was met with Zayn's eyes and it looked as if they were saying to me, "I told you so."

Class started, so there was no way out for me to get to Harry as fast as I wanted to, so I had to wait for Mr. Brooklyn's "good morning" speech to be over so I could grab my stuff and tell him I was going to the nurse's office. After a good two minutes of Brooklyn babbling and me anxiously waiting for him to be done, I finally grabbed my stuff and walked up to his desk. He'd assigned us book work, so the class was occupied as I approached his desk.

"'M not feelin' too good, Mr. Brooklyn, I really think I need to go to the nurse." I fake gagged and he slipped me a pass.

Thank god.

I ran as fast as I could outside and tried to figure out which direction Harry could have gone. I didn't know if he had a car or a bike, or if he walked home. I didn't see anyone in the parking lot, so I decided to take a jaunt around the school just to make sure he wasn't near the bike locks or skate lockers. Just as I approached the bike locks, I saw a red bike with a small figure atop it, racing for the pedestrian stop light.

I started running- no, sprinting to the light where Harry was. Thankfully, the light had been red for Harry so he couldn't get away from me. Or at least I thought. Because right as I got a hundred or so feet away, the light turned for him and he was off. I wasn't letting him go this easily, so I started sprinting again towards him. At this point, I was very glad for my athleticism from years of football (soccer). He hadn't noticed me yet, and I was getting tired, but I figured since he rode his bike, he couldn't have lived too far from school. He finally turned a corner to a house and got off his bike quickly as he ran inside and closed the door behind him.

Fuck.

I walked over to the house and thought I'd try and knock on the door when I realised that Harry had in fact not closed it all the way. There was a small crack that allowed me to let myself in. This could've been considered illegal entering, but I really needed to figure out what was happening with Harry. I mean, ever since I met him Friday, I couldn't get him out of my head. I walked in the house and headed upstairs when I saw that the downstairs area wasn't occupied by the curly headed lad.

I just need to understand.