As i sat down on the couch in my Livingroom and stared at the window I saw them coming I was just to shocked to move. ITS LIKE MY BODY WAS STUCK IN MY MIND I WAS RUNNING BUT IN REALITY I WAS SITTING STILL. All suited up they came to the door BOOM BOOM BOOM after 3 attempts with the boot they finally pushed the door down. GET ON THE GROUND HANDS ON YOUR HEAD. They all ran in at once there uniforms read SWAT TEAM....As i lay on the floor with this motherfuckers (the police) knee in my back and shot gun to my head all i could think about was my 2 babies napping upstairs. HOW DID I GET TO THIS POINT?!?
October 17, 1986 the year and date it all started. my life has been in shambles every since. From being raped and sexually abused to having a child at the age of 16 being put in a group home to going to jail. Alot of you may think you know me, but trust me you have no clue!! Well Let me let y'all hear it from the horses mouth...1988 I was only two years old, but I remember it lie it was yesterday, banging on the door and on the other side was my dad he was coming to take me from my mom. I cried I screamed I even bit him. Don't get me wrong I love my dad but seeing my mom everyday she was all I knew I was used to that environment. My dad snatched me out of my mother's arms and headed for the door. My mom cussed and screamed as she came behind him as he put me in the car I kicked and screamed I even attempted to open the door as we drove off I just starred out the window with tears rolling down my eyes I starred until the house was no longer visible "WHY DID HE DO THIS I THOUGHT" WAS HE HELPING ME OR HURTING ME?!?
My dad and stepmom got full custody of me. After that I really didn't see to much of my mom or my siblings. My stepmom was nice I was the only girl I had two older step brothers they grew on me I really considered them my blood after I got out of the you're not my mom I don't have to listen to you mood. I realized that she was only trying to help me. Growing up with my dad and step mom and brothers I was very spoiled she treated me just like I was her own and to be honest I felt like I was. Even though I felt lie a family with them I often wondered about my mom and sisters and brother I missed them so much, but it had been years since I have seen them I used to think maybe they forgot about me. I never really was able to see or talk to my mom because she was incarcerated. My oldest sister was the backbone to the rest of my siblings she did it all mostly on her own when my mom was locked up she went to school put my other sister through school got a job and made sure they had a roof over there heads food to eat and clothes on their back I really admire her she has been through so much but not once has she given up. My Other sister also did what she had to do to get through school work and help with the bills she graduated right behind my oldest sister. My brother well I never got to know him until I was older he was moved to Philadelphia to be raised. Like any other family mine was far from perfect. We lived in Portsmouth VA I only visited Suffolk on the weekends to go stay with my grandma my dads mother. I stayed up under her but then again, all her grandkids did, and it was a lot of us. She was the sweetest person I knew also the strongest. When she passed it broke my heart into pieces the backbone to our family was gone. Holidays or gatherings were no longer the same our family became more and more distant.
After my grandma passed we moved to Suffolk in her old house out Lake Kennedy good old adkins circle. I think after my grandma passing it took a toll on my dad he started drinking uncontrollably but no matter how drunk he got he punched that clock every morning and made sure home was taken care of. I called my dad my hero because if wouldn't have came to get me no telling where I would've ended up. It seems like when we moved to Suffolk everything just went downhill. My dad and stepmom started fussing and fighting more my dad started drinking more to the point where on the weekend before 7 in the morning my dad was already drunk by 12 in the afternoon a neighbor would knock on the door and say y'all daddy in the yard sleep or he down the street drunk come get him.
I could never go outside so I really didn't have any friends on the weekends I would babysit my little cousins at my aunt house while they would go out I didn't mind because I never had nothing to do and it was a sense of relief getting out the house seeing my dad drunk again. My aunt had a boyfriend which also was a friend of the family he always went with them out but this night he didn't him and my aunt was fussing about something. Laying in the Livingroom watching tv until my two little cousins feel asleep. I woke them up to get them out the floor and upstairs to the bedroom they went in the room and went back to sleep. I was still watching tv I normally never went to sleep until everyone came in. my aunt boyfriend came in and sat on chair on the opposite side of the room. He just kept starring at me he then moved to the chair where I was and begin to touch breast he said you got these great big titties you remind me of dolly Parton. I hate that lady to this day because of that.
I was so scared I didn't know what to do I told him to stop mind you I'm only 12 years old maybe 13. He just kept feeling on me until he began to kiss on my neck and stroke his hands between my legs all I could do was cry and think why me lord. He then laid me on floor and ripped my night pants down and he forced his self-inside of me. after he was finished he told me if I told no one would believe me. So, I never said anything now is the first time I have ever spoke about it. He began to visit our house more frequently on the weekends my dad would be drunk my stepmom at work and my uncle and brothers would be gone he kept raping me and touching on me until he stopped coming around do to the fact him and my aunt broke up that was the best day of my life. Even though the rape and abuse stopped I still felt it I felt violated I felt disgusted I had nightmares about it and to this day when I see him in public I get chills.
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Silent Cries: My True Life Story
Non-FictionSNEAK PREVIEW LIFES LESSONS: this is my true life story.... As I sat down on the couch in my living room and stared at the window I saw them coming I was just to shocked to move. ITS LIKE MY BODY WAS STUCK IN MY MIND I WAS RUNNING BUT IN REALITY I...