The Secret Rebel (Rough Draft)

Chapter 18

*movement* that's what I feel, I think it's my back, maybe, I'm not sure. What's going on? I feel like nothing, blackness is all I sense, somethings happening... light, The blacks becoming brown, now light tan.
"Ay! W~" the words filtered in, they seem concerned, am I dead? Well that'd fucking suck if I am.
"May! Wake up!" The words became more clear and less distant, the concern seeming more present than before. I twitched my eyes, softly opening them I looked up, Grey?
"May?!" He quickly slapped my face, reaching up I swatted his hand away.
"What're you doing?" I mumbled as I let a groan and rolled onto my side. Ignoring the slight, throbbing pain in my head i looked over at him.
"You were passed out in the tub." His face is strained and looked like he was about to cry.
"What?" When did i pass out?
I glanced over at him, his dark hair a disheveled mess, i watched silently as he threw something on me. Making a curt 'hm' sounding I looked down, I'm ass cheek naked, in front of my little brother. fucking l. Grabbing whatever cloth thing he threw at me, I covered myself.
"You need to go to the doctors... now!" He didn't really yell much, but for once he did, and Jesus Christ did he sound like Dad.
"Well can you at least me get dressed" I groggily mumbled as wiped my eyes.
"I'll be back in five minutes" he said in a chip tone, i must've really scared the shit out of him. I wonder what happened? I rolled over off the bed and softly onto the floor, balancing myself on my hands and feet. Grabbing the bed I pushed myself up, looking around, I walked over to my dresser in a almost drunken swagger. Grabbing a t shirt, underwear, and yoga pants I dressed my self throwing on a pair of old mocasines that had seen better days. Walking out of my room I leaned onto the wall, I feel so weak, well feble, well more like shit if I'm to be honest with myself. Walking out of the office i leaned on the wall, I watched as a door opened and Grey popped out.
"Oh hey" I said in drunk demor, my hair stuck together in almost dread like knots.
"Jesus May what the fuck did you do!?" Good question, what the fuck did I do? I thought as I tried to think of the previous events that seemed to be adrift in my mind.
"I don't know"
"God you're a fucking idiot"
"Hey fuckface just because I'm in a shit state now, doesn't mean I'm scared to haul ass when I'm up again"
"Yeah yeah just go back to being a bitch. Nothing new"
I looked at him then looked down, my hair covering the dejection that my face is currently writhing in.
"You don't have to be such a dick about it" i mumbled as he tossed me onto the passenger seat of a car.
Sometimes I forget just how of a dick they can be. I watched as we pulled out the garage and out in the driveway, the sun piercing my eyes. We drove for about 30 minutes before we pulled up to an actual hospital, Grey nagging me to keep my eyes open and some shit about a coma. Getting out of the car I walked with him into the emergency room, my legs awkwardly catching cases of the mush midstep causing me to rely on Grey for the short walk from the parking lot. Walking up to the counter, I watched as Grey started to talk before I could even utter a word.
"I found her passed... she doesn't..." his words blurred in and out of existence, losing balance I stumbled backwards.
"May?" I watched as Grey held me up, but it didn't do me all to much justice. Watching the ceiling I felt myself drop as I was dropped into a wheelchair. Focus may I thought as I tried to zone in on the smells and sounds of the building. Why do i fucking up like this? Shit my vision became incomprehensible, fuck I felt my eyes roll back, then nothing.
.....
beep...Beep...beep
What the fuck is that sound? I rolled onto my side, my hair awkwardly entangling itself into my mouth. Well around my mouth that is. Lightly biting down, I softly grinded my teeth against plastic tubing that's apparently in my mouth. What the fuck I grabbed at the tube and pulled, meekly I pulled the tube out of my mouth. What the hell is going on I gently opened my eyes, not realizing they had been closed. Seems like I've found myself in a familiar predicament. I looked around the empty hospital room, the room awkwardly lit up. Continuing to look around the room I noticed the sky's dark. How long have I been out I grabbed at the sheets then at my face again, Finally noticing The feeling of air being forced down my nose. Grabbing the tube I pulled it out of my nose, letting it rest on my chest.
"Fucking l, what do I do now" I looked down at the blanket, a buzzer with a red button is laying where my hand used to be. Picking it up I pressed the button, nothing. Heaving a sigh I somehow sinked further back into the bed.
"Oh you're awake"
"Whatthefuc!k" I screamed loudly as women seemingly busted into the room.
"How're you feeling?" I stared at the vivacious blonde haired woman, her hands reaching for the machine. Pressing a few buttons, she turned to me, grabbing a clipboard and pen she started to write stuff down.
"Ok?"my throat burns from the scream from earlier
"Well that's good, I'll call your family to let them know you're awake. You've been out for about 2 days"
"Wha?"
"Yep, it's Saturday night"
"Saturday night?" I said in a meekish tone as she walked out, noticing a clicker I turned the tv on.
"2 days" my voice low and raspy, my throat dryer t than a field in the summer that hasn't seen water in months.
......
My body jerked as I heard the door suddenly opened, I watched with a glum face as they walked in. Their faces a mixture of angry and somberness, mainly from Grey, sitting down they stared at me.
"You have a problem" Grey is the first to talk, his hair a black mess.
"Well no shit Sherlock- "
"May!" My eyes jutted to moms, her hair also a blonde mess, still wearing pajamas she gripped the edge of the chair.
"God you are such a fu-"
"Lilian!" Dad yelled before she could finish,
"Oh come let her finish." I egged her own
"When will you learn to shut your mouth?" Jake mumbled as he complained about having to be here. Grabbing a lock of hair, I twirled it around, trying my best not look away from their strong glares.
"Look, we have decided that you're not to be trusted, even with a blocked door. So we're going to put in a new rule, I'm putting permanent locks on the windows-"
"But what if-"
"Let me finish. You're windows are getting locked, that's it. You've already hurt yourself enough." Dad said, his voice starting to gain a softer tone, the one he more or so hid.
"Whatd you even do anyways?" I looked over to Grey, my face twisting in confusion. What did I do
"I-I-I don't know" I said quietly as twiddled my thumbs. Oh my god what did I do! My eyes went wide as I tried to recall what happened, nothing. My minds completely blank.
"What do you mean you don't know." Dad said as he looked at me with a confused and concerned face.
"I can't remember" I felt my eyes get glossy as nothing trailed across my mind.
"I'm getting a doctor" Dad rushed out in a panic, the others faces taking on a darker look and in a dark, calm sobriety i looked back down at my fingers.
     what happened to me? Where did i go? How did i get home? Sweat started to bead on my forehead did i get in a fight? Was i raped? My blood seemed to run cold, the hair on my arm standing up straight. Was i? The worst part is, i feel so vulnerable and yet i here i sit in front of my family as if i had simply stubbed my toe. Shouldn't i feel worse? Shouldn't i scream and cry? These are my memories. Shouldn't i be the least bit sad that i cant remember anything? Maybe it's for the best if i didn't. Continuing to twiddle my thumbs i looked back over at mom and them. They arent looking at me anymore, instead they directed their glares to their phones. Probably talking on some group chat they excluded me out of. God their so fucking meticulous.
    I watched as the door opened, a doctor walked in with a concerned face.
"So ive been told you dont remember how you got that concussion, is that corrects?"he asked as he looked over my clipboard, his gray hair lightly bouncing as he so.
"Yes" i curtly replied as continued to twiddle my thumbs.
"Do you remember what you were doing before the accident?" I thought back, i was at Walmart getting spray paint. Then I was in a alleyway, drinking something... hm... what was it.. wait a minute... four... loko. Oh shit, I got smashed and passed out in alleyway.
"Kind of, yeah, little fuzzy but yeah"
"Where you drink" man he just had to start with the big guns didn't he? Horrified of what would happen I nodded a curt 'no'
"Well were going to have r run a few scans to make sure it's nothing too perminate, ok?"
"Ok" I said nimbly as he walked out the room.
It seemed like hours till he was back, and when he was, I was being transferred into a different room. Cat scan, why a cat scan? Couldn't they have chosen something less cliche? Laying down on the white table, I ignored most of what they had to say. I don't want to hear it, it's probably nothing good anyways, I twitched as the machine pulled me into itself. I stared up at it, it's weird, just a spinning tube moving the waves around me. Pulling out of it I got up, with the help of a nurse, and back down into a wheelchair. Rolling me back into the room, the nurse helped me back into the bed, putting the iv back in and hooking me up to the machine. It took about an hour before any of the doctors came back, and with them was the obvious.
"I'm gonna have to ask you guys to leave, I would like to talk to miss. Grou alone." A brunette said as she stared down at the clip bored. Watching as they all walked out, I turned my glance back to her. An uneasy feeling settling in the pit of my stomach.
" so may, You do show signs of slight short term memory loss, it may or may not come back. Sometimes a trigger will help the memories come back. Because of the circumstances it's recommended to do a rape kit just to make sure nothing happened while you were unconscious." I looked at her, then back to my thumbs, it's all so unnerving.
"I'll do it" i said uncomfortably as I looked anywhere but where her eyes are.
"Ok, so your going to need someone else in the room, it can be a parent, nurse."
"Another nurse, and uh dont tell my parents" I stammered out in a hush tone as I stared up at her, my eyes wide with concern and horror of embarrassment.
"Of course that's all under confidentiality, I'll be right back. I'll tell them to wait in the waiting room"
"Ok"
That was one of the most uncomfortable fucking things I've ever done, like why the hell did I agree to that. I could've said no at time but I went through with just to be told I'm still squeaky clean. Well at least I can go to sleep at night with a clear conscious, sort of. I wasn't at the hospital for long, maybe another hour, then I was free to leave. I was overall Fine, I had just given myself a concussion, and due to the drinking(for what I assume) gave myself some short term memory loss. I'll probably never remember what happened that time, which sucks hairy balls. But what could I do now? Nothing and that's fucking what.