1/20/18

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Days were getting harder how could I keep things from the people I love,I couldn't contuine living this life,what did I deserve to live this horrible painful life,I couldn't tell people what goes on every night while she's away in the place were she gave birth to me how was I gonna tell the woman I love and who gave me this life that I didn't want this life anymore it's hard to keep a straight face on when bad things were or is happing that I couldn't tell my love ones,as I sit here writing this I can't actually say who, or what,or even when but I could say this if I told you what happened every night for the past 9 years of my life you wouldn't be able to stand it and that's something I don't won't even though I love you so much I just don't want you to be hurt knowing what I go through,so that's why I fake smiles,fake laughs,fake everything because I don't want the people I love and care about know the real me because it's to damn fucking heart breaking.

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