Within This Moment ~ Frerard ~ slow updates

Fuckin' Stupid

Gerard was perched on the first cracked, cemented step that protruded from the porch of his house, watching smoke escape his lips in long, spiraling puffs. The moon sat on the city's skyline, full and casting a warm glow despite the deception of the night's temperatures. Gerard paid no mind to the chilly air, focusing on nothing but all the sounds that could reach his ears. Quiet moments were rare in Jersey, so Gerard was relieved for the peace. He often was overwhelmed by too much action or noise, and he frequently questioned to himself why he still lived in the city. Immediately after wondering such a thing, he reminded himself that the numbers attached to his bank account were very small, and he couldn't afford to move.

A faint whistle-like noise sounded, and the stench of grease-soaked food attacked his sense of smell, making him gag in disgust. Not having given any care or effort to change clothes, he remained in his work uniform even after his shift ended hours ago. It had been a few days since he'd washed that particular uniform though, so short on money he couldn't spare even a few coins to the laundromat. He'd also been smoking since the second he left the diner, taking his sweet time to go through the pack one by one. Gerard really hated the bitter taste, but he couldn't stop, which was severely disappointing for him when he realized there was only a single cigarette left. His mind had been a ramble all afternoon all because of the dark-haired and tattooed man who just had to walk into Izzy's and smile so perfectly and talk in the way he did.

"Fuckin' stupid," Gerard mumbled to himself as he replayed the day's memories in his mind. He resented the way the short interaction had picked up his mind and spun it on the very tip of their finger, like some professional athlete with a basketball. Gerard remembered the way the man had been so interested in his bright hair. Normally people would give him a strange look and say nothing, and when they did comment on it, they never compared him to Disney princesses. And then the guy, out of nowhere, demands coffee from Gerard like he was royalty. Reliving it made white-hot rage boil up inside his gut, and before he could process what he was doing, Gerard jumped up from his porch step and with all his strength, kicked his foot into the brown garbage bin that sat in front of his porch. It fell on its side with a loud crash, the lid swinging open and trash tumbling out of it and disposing all over his lawn.

His fiery anger dissipated in a single second, instead of being replaced with exasperation and a sudden weariness. The switch of emotions, he guessed, took all the remaining energy he had, since he hadn't slept much the night prior. The wreck of a man stepped forward to pick up his fallen trash, but a voice startled him.

"You know, cigarettes are supposed to calm you down," Gerard snapped his head up towards the direction of the voice and could see the silhouette of a curvy woman leaning against the light post. "They aren't supposed to make you angry. Although I've heard they can give people terrible mood swings if they try and stop. I don't think that's what you're doing though, not by the way you practically ate that package."

Gerard tensed for a moment, realizing that he recognized the voice and the woman speaking would've had to been watching him for some time if she saw him go through his pack. He considered that she could've been bluffing just to mess with him- he figured she couldn't see him through the heavy curtain of darkness the night brought- until he remembered how cigarettes worked. When he clicked his lighter to ignite his addiction, the feeble flame most likely created just enough light for her to piece together what he was doing.

"If you accepted those concert tickets you could go blow off some steam. A show like that is good for forgetting." Her voice was cocky and flowed like sand, but somehow was rough like riprap. If Gerard swung a much different way, he'd easily be swayed by the seduction stitched in her tone.

He walked towards the light post, the luminescent glow from the bulb chasing the night's shadows from the woman's figure. As Gerard stepped under the light to come face to face with her, his suspicions about her identity were correct. The cashier from the gas station smirked at him, her teeth bright white in perfect contrast to her pitch black hair.