Impossible

Chapter 38

Chapter 38

Author’s P.O.V

Two weeks.

Two weeks since he’s heard her voice.

Two weeks since he’s communicated with her.

Two weeks since he last told her 'I love you.'

Two weeks since he’s experienced the most excruciating pain also known as heartbreak.

You see it’s a different kind of pain. It’s a pain that comes from the inside. An acid that burns from the soul of your heart and spreads like wildfire around your entire body. It swallows your heart, inch by inch, until it no longer beats. It clogs your throat. It leaks from your eyes. It invades your brain until you could be considered certifiably insane. And the worst part for Justin was that he held absolutely no fight.

He surrendered to the acidic sting. And it overcame him entirely until he could do nothing but lay in his bed, think about her, and let that acid descend his cheeks every now and again.

But he wouldn’t say anything. He didn’t want to find out the truth. He didn’t want to ask her, only to find out what he already knows. He didn’t want to hear it. That she doesn’t love him. That she’s been two-timing him this whole time. That would only kill him.

It was never his decision really; he already knew he wouldn’t confess his knowledge of the affair; he couldn’t leave her. And he knew he wouldn’t be able to have a normal conversation with her, not now. He knew he wouldn’t be able to hear her voice without questioning her. Therefore he laid here, on his bed, ignoring her texts, her calls, her emails, her everything. He couldn’t bring himself to listen to her endless number of voicemails or even glance at her countless messages.

Spending all my time loving you,

all my time loving you,

need a few more seconds in my day

Selena’s ringtone began to play on Justin’s beside table, but he couldn’t make a move to answer it.

From when I wake up,

to when I lay down,

all I got is you baby on my brain

Justintook the pillow beneath his head and curled around his ears to block the music. That familiar burn in his chest flared again once he heard the ringtonecut off; she was sent to voicemail.

He heard his door suddenly being opened. Justin didn’t move. The guys were well used to his depressed behavior the past two weeks….even if they didn’t know the reason behind it. They had grown to accept that Justin was keeping his mouth shut and to let him work it out himself.

"Hey dude," Ryan’s voice was full of pity for his friend. "We’re all heading outtonight, you wanna come? The guys are sneaking me into a club.” Justin could feel Ryan’s smile by the end of his last sentence.

Justin’s fists clenched under the blankets and he only replied with a strained “No.” It was difficult for him to control his hurt and rage toward his so called “friend” and wanted him to simply leave.

"Suit yourself," Ryan sighed before Justin heard the click of the door shutting.

~

Justin awoke with a sudden tickle of breath to the back of his neck. He shot up in his bed and looked around through the darkness of the room. His eyes locked with a tall, curvaceous brunette who sat at the edge of his bed. He could smell the subtle scent of cheap beer linger around her.